AP 489: Why It’s OK to Have Regrets + What to Do When You Struggle with Them

It's a pet peeve of mine when people say they "don't have regrets." While I understand what they mean by that, I think it's too dismissive of the lessons we learn from a life fully lived. In fact, I can name several regrets I have, without hesitation. From the way I handled friends and extracurriculars in and after high school, to my own missteps as an emotionally dysregulated young mother, plus a few more examples, you'll see that I am far from perfect.

When regret leads to resentment and shame, it can be more harmful than helpful. What's helpful is learning lessons from our past mistakes, what's harmful is dwelling on our imperfections and making them mean something untrue about our identity. In this episode I walk through some of my regrets using my four step method designed to help you do the same on your own. My hope is that this helps you disentangle your identity from your mistakes, and allows you to move forward in your growth.

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