Berner Phone

By Hannah Berner and Des Bishop

Comedy

What's Berner Phone about?

The Berner Phone hotline is open! Hannah Berner and her husband, comedian Des Bishop, are listening to callers, dishing out their best advice, and bantering back with hilarious chemistry for their first ever podcast together. Keep an eye out on their Instagram stories for prompts to leave a voice message and be featured on the pod. Whether it’s pet peeves, secrets, life advice, dating dilemmas, or career questions, Hannah and Des are dialed in.

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LAST EPISODE

Berner Phone #18: Secrets R...

12.07.2023

Secrets are being revealed…there are age gap relationships, people cheating, and happy endings being given. Plus, Hannah made a mistake on Cameo. honeylove.com/BERN EmbracePetInsurance.com/BERN marinelayer.com/BERN15

Berner Phone episodes:

12.07.2023 Berner Phone #18: Secrets Revealed Secrets are being revealed…there are age gap relationships, people cheating, and happy endings being given. Plus, Hannah made a mistake on Cameo. honeylove.com/BERN EmbracePetInsurance.com/BERN marinelayer.com/BERN15
11.30.2023 Berner Phone #17: Airing Your Grievances The dialers are getting things off their chest this week. They have some serious grievances about airports, pestering shy people, and getting sober. 20% off w/ code BERNER at manscaped.com 10% off w/ code BERN at oseamalibu.com 15% off at ...
11.24.2023 Berner Phone #16: Biggest Irrational Fears The little dialers are scared of everything from mayo to The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air to the DMV. You’ll have to find out if we validate your fears or laugh at them.
11.15.2023 Berner Phone #15: What Men Want Women to Know This week men are revealing the things they want women to know. They aren’t always thinking about sex and don’t want to hear about your exes, but at the same time they are self proclaimed “horny garbage”.
11.09.2023 Berner Phone #14: Annoying Generational Differences This week we’re working through some intergenerational conflict. Gen Z can’t stand how older people text, rake leaves, and use social media. Millennials and Gen X are bothered by ever-changing lingo and TikTok. And everyone is mad that people yell ...
11.02.2023 Berner Phone #13: Random Life Advice For the first time, we are taking life advice questions from the little dialers and we'll see where it takes us. This week we’re discussing how we can learn to say no, long distance relationships, and confusing situationships.
10.26.2023 Berner Phone #12: More Dumb Etiquette and Traditions The phonies are fed up with office small talk, mommy influencers, and wedding traditions. Plus, Hannah's mom makes an appearance on the pod. embracepetinsurance.com/bern
10.19.2023 Berner Phone #11: Dumb Etiquette and Traditions We are all eating cold food, holding doors, and asking permission to get married in the name of etiquette and tradition. The little dialers have had enough and so have we. hellofresh.com/50bern Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get ...
10.12.2023 Berner Phone #10: Your Unorthodox Kinks From armpits to toilets to breeding, no kink is left unturned in this new episode of Berner Phone!
10.04.2023 Berner Phone #9: Your Most Petty Moments The little dialers have committed some petty acts against exes, coworkers, neighbors, siblings, and spouses. Hannah and Des are here to justify your most petty moments.
09.27.2023 Berner Phone #8: Your Best Relationship Advice Ever Hannah and Des finally discuss love. They asked the little dialers about the best advice they ever received when it comes to having a successful relationship. Download the dating app for ambitious GoalDiggers, The League at https://click.theleague.com/qmhm/bernerphone. To skip the ...
09.20.2023 Berner Phone #7: Dialer's Dilemmas This week we’re listening to your biggest dilemmas. Someone’s boyfriend is a secret submissive, we share our opinions on losing weight for a wedding, and contemplate dating as a stripper. Hannah has standup shows coming up in Tempe, Bensalem, Sacramento, ...
09.13.2023 Berner Phone #6: Your Guiltiest Pleasures This week the little dialers get some of the guiltiest pleasures off their chest. From chef boyardee to situationships and anal itching, we’re here to make you feel a little less guilty. honeylove.com/BERN Recover properly with @waterboy and get 15% ...
09.06.2023 Berner Phone #5: The Best Life Advice You Ever Got This week we asked our little dialers to give us the best life advice they've ever gotten! Some knowledge dropped about jealousy, performance pressure, caring too much about what people think, and marriage advice about ball sucking! Live stand up ...
08.30.2023 Berner Phone #4: Pet Peeves Part Deux with Des We're back this week with more pet peeves to work through your issues with road rage, self checkout ettiquette, and yawning. Stand up shows coming up in Mashantucket, Westhampton, Austin, San Antonio, Dallas, Houston, Tucson, Tempe, Buffalo, and more! Tickets ...
08.24.2023 Berner Phone #3: Pet Peeves Part One with Des The hotline was blowing up this week because everyone is annoyed about something. We listen to your pet peeves while Hannah and Des’ generational differences are exposed when discussing directions, we advise husbands to stop asking “are you ok?”, and ...
08.17.2023 Jared Freid: 37 & Single Jared Freid’s comedy special 37 and Single is out now on Netflix. Go watch it now for his take on dating apps, late-night eating, and to find out why he’s still single. He explains why dating gets harder as you ...
08.10.2023 Berner Phone #2: The Most Embarrassing Moments Ever with Des Bishop Berner Phone is back with our reactions to your most embarrassing stories. Bosses have been kissed, there was a lazy eye misunderstanding, and somehow JonBenet Ramsey is involved. You guys are wild and we love it. Submit advice questions here ...
08.03.2023 Berner Phone #1: Beige Flags with Des Bishop Welcome to the first episode of Berner Phone!!! I’m always interviewing people on podcasts and on the street, but in this new segment, I get to hear from you! Stay tuned on my Instagram @hannahberner for prompts and links to ...
07.25.2023 Tori Dunlap: Financial Feminist & Negotiating Tactics This week in hell we are collabing with Tori Dunlap's podcast Financial Feminist: Her First $100k. We discuss smart money tips to fight the patriarchy while sharing our personal experiences of navigating finances and negotiations. I have stand up shows ...
07.20.2023 Sabrina Brier: Cringeworthy & Cool Delusion Sabrina Brier is a New York comedian who plays “the girl who bullied you in high school who is trying to be an influencer” on her viral TikToks. She explains why she’s wearing a wedding ring, makes a bold claim ...
07.13.2023 Cat Cohen: Canon Events & Background Character Energy The gorgeous Cat Cohen is in hell today to discuss her new live show, her demons, and top tier banter. Come to my stand-up shows: Newark, Tarrytown, Mashantucket, Westhampton, Austin, San Antonio, Dallas, Houston! Get tickets here!
07.12.2023 Zarna Garg: Arranged Marriages & One In A Billion The internet's realest mom, comedian Zarna Garg, came to hell! She opens up about being kicked out at 14, her one-of-a-kind career, and why mother-in-laws are the worst. Come to my stand-up shows: Newark, Tarrytown, Mashantucket, Westhampton, Austin, San Antonio, ...
07.08.2023 Cat Cohen: Cat Cohen: Canon Events & Background Character Energy The gorgeous Cat Cohen is in hell today to discuss her new live show, her demons, and top tier banter. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
06.29.2023 Emily Morse: Boost Your Sex IQ & Be Smart In Bed Emily Hope Morse is a sex therapist, author and media personality. She is the host of the long-running podcast Sex with Emily and she tells us how to have smarter sex! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
06.23.2023 Carmen Lynch: Getting Discovered & Feeling Awkward Comedian Carmen Lynch is on the show to talk about her new special coming out! See her record her special live at the Comedy Cellar in NYC on June 26th. Tickets here! I have stand up shows coming up in ...
06.11.2023 Ashley Gavin: Open Relationships & Outside Babies Ashley is back with a new comedy special out that I LOVED! Watch it here! She opens up about her open relationship, how is happened, and how it's going! She also talks about the process of creating her first special ...
06.02.2023 Michael Blaustein: Being Cute & Comedic Michael Blaustein is a comedian and cohost of Stiff Socks who stopped by hell. He was hard to break but I ultimately did it! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
05.25.2023 Des Bishop: My Husband & My Trauma Des is back!!! We take questions from the little devils. We start light and then it gets pretty heavy. We are also fostering Abby! If you are interesting in adopting this little angel, check her out here! Hosted on Acast. ...
05.18.2023 Maria Menounos: Healing In Hell & Her Next Chapter The icon herself, Maria Menounos, is in hell with me today! We discuss why she finally decided to tell people about surviving pancreatic cancer, understanding warning signs in her body and mind, working in a male dominated industry, and becoming ...
05.11.2023 Out & About: Drag Queens & Conversion Camps Patrick McAuliffe and Joey Camasta are my besties who stopped by hell to discuss anal, how they came out to their parents, what fixed their anxiety, and much more silliness. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
05.03.2023 Jake Shane: Octopus Lover & Learning From History @Octopusslover8 is blowing up the internet right now, so we HAD to have him in hell! Jake Shane should win an Oscar for his hilarious relatable reenactments of historical events and I got to ask him about his creative process, ...
04.26.2023 Jeffree Star: Down Low Hookups & Healing Jeffree Star has left his ranch in Montana to come all the way to hell. He is on TikTok, has new makeup coming out, and has a ton of opinions on other makeup lines, hookups, and self help. Hosted on ...
04.21.2023 Benedict Polizzi: Polite Catcalling & Hair Transplanting Benny is back on the pod with a new viral video series called "polite catcalling" and he survived being a cast member on FBoy Island. He opens up about his deepest insecurities and his dating life on the road as ...
04.13.2023 Barbara Corcoran: How To Be A Shark & Manifest Money BARBARA CORCORAN AKA THE QUEEN AKA MOTHER AKA THE SHARK AKA THE BADDEST BIOTCH IS IN HELL!!!! (as you can tell I'm freaking out) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
04.07.2023 Brian Kelly: The Points Guy & Financial Hacks Brian Kelly is the founder of The Points Guy and is the most trusted voice when it comes to loyalty programs, credit cards and travel. He told me all the best hacks for being financially savvy! He also opens up ...
03.30.2023 Berning Questions: My Current Struggles & Favorite Condiments I'm coming to Vegas, Boston, Tarrytown, Newark, Oklahoma, and Louisville! Get tickets HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
03.22.2023 Ella Halikas: Body Trends & Believing In Yourself Ella explains how she manifested being a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit model. She faces tons of rejected but never let it stop her from chasing her dream. She gives her secrets to confidence, taking great photos, and feeling comfortable in her ...
03.09.2023 Violet Benson: Private Parts & Ski Problems Violet is back in hell for a wild ep about porn addiction, guys going down on you, and all her current struggles that she is coping with (all very fun and cute!) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
03.01.2023 Joanne McNally: Repping Ireland & Recovery Joanne McNally comes all the way from Ireland to join me in hell! I bought her a fake bag in Chinatown and she opened up to me about how she battled bulimia, being adopted, and how she figured out she ...
02.22.2023 Ken Eurich: Fur Babies & Boob Jobs Ken joins hell today to discuss her mental health meds, decision to get her boobs done, dealing with trolls. and being a mom of a pitbull and multiple cats, Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
02.16.2023 Chris Olsen: Red Carpets & Rehab My arch nemesis is in hell today and he just launched a coffee company called Flight Fuel! He opens up about his public break ups, family interventions, rehab, alcohol addiction, and some other fun lighter stuff. Hosted on Acast. See ...
02.09.2023 Jay Shetty: Ex-Monk & His Hell Jay Shetty is one of the most viral life coaches in the world who has a shit ton of wisdom but I sat him down to find out more about his struggles, his love life, and how he survives his ...
02.03.2023 Eli Rallo: Slutty Snacks & Essays About Love Eli Rallo is a Columbia Journalism School graduate who went viral for making snack jars during covid. She opens up about how she wrote her new book "I Didn't Know I Needed This" in spite of her anxiety and never ...
01.23.2023 Maddy Smith: Wild & Out Of Your Mind Maddy Smith is a hysterical stand up comedian and a cast member on MTV's Wild 'n Out. She talks about making it in the comedy industry, her most embarrassing moments on stage, roast battles, dealing with parents, and being too ...
01.05.2023 Matt Friend: Celebrity Impressionist & Glorified Parrot Matt Friend comes to hell with Sebastian Maniscalco, Andy Cohen, Howard Stern, Armie Hammer, and more. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
12.23.2022 Paulie Calafiore: BDSM & Big Brother Paulie is back on Berning in Hill to discuss the status of his past open relationship, his business moves, his mental health, and opens up about BDSM. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
12.14.2022 Brooke Miccio: Pizza Bagel & Vlog Expert Brooke Miccio has been YouTubing for over a decade! She reveals her tips for vlogging and how she has let her audience in on her life from high school, to college, to moving to NYC, and her new boyfriend. She ...
12.08.2022 Emily DiDonato: The Dark Side Of Being A Supermodel & Postpartum Emily DiDonato is the first supermodel in hell! She's been the face of Maybelline, Giorgio Armani Perfume, and has worked for major brands such as Victoria's Secret, Miu Miu, Oscar De La Renta, Guess, and many more. She talks about ...
11.26.2022 Francis Ellis: Mansplaining & Falling From Grace Francis is back in hell and we have both been through a lot since the last time we recorded. We've lost jobs, got married, and learned a lot about life. He asks me about Tiktok and the rules of feminism. ...

Older episodes

Berner Phone

What's Berner Phone about?

Download our free app to listen on your phone

Berner Phone episodes:

Berner Phone #18: Secrets Revealed

Berner Phone #17: Airing Your Grievances

Berner Phone #16: Biggest Irrational Fears

Berner Phone #15: What Men Want Women to Know

Berner Phone #14: Annoying Generational Differences

Berner Phone #13: Random Life Advice

Berner Phone #12: More Dumb Etiquette and Traditions

Berner Phone #11: Dumb Etiquette and Traditions

Berner Phone #10: Your Unorthodox Kinks

Berner Phone #9: Your Most Petty Moments

Berner Phone #8: Your Best Relationship Advice Ever

Berner Phone #7: Dialer's Dilemmas

Berner Phone #6: Your Guiltiest Pleasures

Berner Phone #5: The Best Life Advice You Ever Got

Berner Phone #4: Pet Peeves Part Deux with Des

Berner Phone #3: Pet Peeves Part One with Des

Jared Freid: 37 & Single

Berner Phone #2: The Most Embarrassing Moments Ever with Des Bishop

Berner Phone #1: Beige Flags with Des Bishop

Tori Dunlap: Financial Feminist & Negotiating Tactics

Sabrina Brier: Cringeworthy & Cool Delusion

Cat Cohen: Canon Events & Background Character Energy

Zarna Garg: Arranged Marriages & One In A Billion

Cat Cohen: Cat Cohen: Canon Events & Background Character Energy

Emily Morse: Boost Your Sex IQ & Be Smart In Bed

Carmen Lynch: Getting Discovered & Feeling Awkward

Ashley Gavin: Open Relationships & Outside Babies

Michael Blaustein: Being Cute & Comedic

Des Bishop: My Husband & My Trauma

Maria Menounos: Healing In Hell & Her Next Chapter

Out & About: Drag Queens & Conversion Camps

Jake Shane: Octopus Lover & Learning From History

Jeffree Star: Down Low Hookups & Healing

Benedict Polizzi: Polite Catcalling & Hair Transplanting

Barbara Corcoran: How To Be A Shark & Manifest Money

Brian Kelly: The Points Guy & Financial Hacks

Berning Questions: My Current Struggles & Favorite Condiments

Ella Halikas: Body Trends & Believing In Yourself

Violet Benson: Private Parts & Ski Problems

Joanne McNally: Repping Ireland & Recovery

Ken Eurich: Fur Babies & Boob Jobs

Chris Olsen: Red Carpets & Rehab

Jay Shetty: Ex-Monk & His Hell

Eli Rallo: Slutty Snacks & Essays About Love

Maddy Smith: Wild & Out Of Your Mind

Matt Friend: Celebrity Impressionist & Glorified Parrot

Paulie Calafiore: BDSM & Big Brother

Brooke Miccio: Pizza Bagel & Vlog Expert

Emily DiDonato: The Dark Side Of Being A Supermodel & Postpartum

Francis Ellis: Mansplaining & Falling From Grace

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