When something truly awful happens, we can’t forget. That memory isn’t just stored in our brains. Our bodies keep the score too. Researcher and psychiatrist Bessel van der Kolk has spent his life studying the affects of trauma on adults and children. In this eye-opening conversation, Kate and Bessel address the nature of trauma, how helplessness and agency affect our experiences, and ways to get unstuck.

Bessel van der Kolk: Our Bodies Keep Score

Are you living your best life now? Not always? This is a podcast for you. Duke Professor Kate Bowler is an expert in the stories we tell about success and failure, suffering and happiness. She had Stage IV cancer. Then she didn’t. And since then, all she wants to do is talk to funny and wise people about how to live with the knowledge that, well, everything happens.  Find her online at @katecbowler.
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Pain is like a geography—one that isn’t foreign to palliative care physician, Dr. Sunita Puri. Kate and Sunita speak about needing new language for walking the borderlands and how we all might learn to live—and die—with a bit more courage.
In this conversation, Kate and Sunita discuss: 

How to walk with one another through life’s ups and downs—especially health ups and downs
What “palliative care” means (and how it is distinct from hospice) 
The difference between what medicine can do and what medicine should do 
Sunita’s script for how to talk to patients facing difficult diagnoses 

This conversation originally aired in 2020 but it is one of our all-time favorites.
 

Watch clips from this conversation, read the full transcript, and access discussion questions by clicking here or visiting katebowler.com/podcasts.
Follow Kate on Instagram, Facebook, or X (formerly known as Twitter)—@katecbowler. Links to social pages and more available at linktr.ee/katecbowler. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sunita Puri: The Uncertainty Specialist

When a group of young moms died around the same time, clinicians Dr. Justin Yopp and Dr. Don Rosenstein wanted to refer their widowed spouses to a grief support group… but none existed. So they started their own. 
In this conversation, Kate, Justin, and Don discuss:

The grief of imagined futures 
The particular needs of parents with cancer and those of widowed parents
How to talk to kids about cancer 
How to parent while you have cancer

Together, they uncover the magic of we.
This summer, we are re-sharing our all-time favorite episodes. While this conversation originally aired in 2020, Kate caught up with Don and Justin to get an update on what they are working on lately. You won’t want to miss their important (and practical!) update.
 

Watch clips from this conversation, read the full transcript, and access discussion questions by clicking here or visiting katebowler.com/podcasts.
Follow Kate on Instagram, Facebook, or X (formerly known as Twitter)—@katecbowler. Links to social pages and more available at linktr.ee/katecbowler. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Justin Yopp and Don Rosenstein: The Magic of “We”

How do we navigate life within these beautiful, terrible days? In this special live episode of the Everything Happens podcast, Kate sits down with American broadcast journalist Judy Woodruff at the historic Sixth & I Synagogue in Washington, DC to discuss Kate’s latest book, Have a Beautiful, Terrible Day! Together, they explore what it means to live through the best of days, the worst of days, and all the in-betweens.
Together, they discuss:

The apology Kate wishes she would have gotten (and the moving story about when she did)
How fragility unites us
How can we be more empathetic towards people we disagree with

 

Watch clips from this conversation, read the full transcript, and access discussion questions by clicking here or visiting katebowler.com/podcasts.
Follow Kate on Instagram, Facebook, or X (formerly known as Twitter)—@katecbowler. Links to social pages and more available at linktr.ee/katecbowler.
  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Judy Woodruff: How Will We Live Our Beautiful, Terrible Days?

We become the sum of so many people throughout our lives. Kate speaks with one of the funniest people on the entire planet, comedian Samantha Bee, about the people who made her, her. What virtues did they create? What absurdity ensued? How does she think about how she impacts her own kids? 
In this conversation, Kate and Samantha discuss:

Samantha's hand of God moment that changed the trajectory of her life
How the people who love us shape us into who we become
What siblings or friends or partners teach us about intimacy

 

Watch clips from this conversation, read the full transcript, and access discussion questions by clicking here or visiting katebowler.com/podcasts.
Follow Kate on Instagram, Facebook, or X (formerly known as Twitter)—@katecbowler. Links to social pages and more available at linktr.ee/katecbowler. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Samantha Bee: This is Going to Be(e) a Great Story

Here on the Everything Happens Podcast we don’t shy away from difficult subjects, and today’s episode tackles a topic we’ve been wanting to discuss for awhile—suicide among teens and young adults. My guest today, Dr. Pamela Morris-Perez is someone who approaches this subject with the heart of a grieving mom and the mind of a professor and practitioner who wants to make change possible and wants to teach us how we can help. This is such an important conversation on how communities can help prevent adolescent suicide.
In this conversation, Kate and Pamela discuss:

Poignant reflections on being a suicide loss survivor from a parent who is grieving the loss of her child—a topic so rarely discussed
Why we say “died by suicide”
How we can prevent teen suicide—including what signs to look for, what to ask, and next steps to take when you’re concerned

In a very important way, this episode won’t create nearly as much anxiety as you think. Talking about suicide is one of the most important ways of making it less likely. So let’s find better language together, shall we?
If you need to talk to someone, call or text 988. If you are worried about someone, you too can call or text 988 to get resources. Remember: you matter. Please listen with care.
 

Watch clips from this conversation, read the full transcript, and access discussion questions by clicking here or visiting katebowler.com/podcasts.
Follow Kate on Instagram, Facebook, or X (formerly known as Twitter)—@katecbowler. Links to social pages and more available at linktr.ee/katecbowler. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Bessel van der Kolk: Our Bodies Keep Score

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