Having - and Being - a Friend at Work: Morag Barrett on PYP 538

When the Gallup organization started looking at employee engagement - basically, a euphemism for the degree to which people like their jobs or think they suck - they came up with a survey tool comprised of 12 questions. Question 10 went like this: "Do you have a best friend at work?"

And much of the corporate world went apeshit over this question.

Some execs felt the question was way too touchy-feely. Others thought it was irrelevant; we're here to get stuff done, not hold hands and sing Kumbaya together.

And some companies refused to participate in the research because - wait for it - they actually discouraged workplace friendships, viewing them as complications that get in the way of productivity and fairness.

And yet the question stayed, because, as it turned out, the answer was one of the biggest predictors of workplace engagement, productivity, and success. Those with a best friend at work felt more encouraged and supported, did more to encourage and support and develop others, and felt like their work was important.

Today's guest, Morag Barrett, along with her SkyeTeam colleagues and coauthors Ruby Vesely and Eric Spencer, understands the importance of having close and meaningful relations in the workplace. In their new book, You Me We, they turn Gallup's question upside down. Instead of inquiring about having a best friend at work, they invite you to ask: "Am I being a best friend at work?"

In other words, how are you showing up for your colleagues and teammates? Do they trust you? Do they feel that you have their back? Can they depend on you? Do they expect helpful candor and rigorous debate to assist their growth?

They've created a pinwheel of qualities of a workplace ally, and challenge all of us to assess ourselves to see where we're strong and where we're weak. Where we show up and where we back down. Where we connect and where we protect.

Here are the categories:

Abundance & GenerosityConnection & CompassionCourage & VulnerabilityCandor & DebateAction & Accountability

In our conversation, Morag and I talk about what's required to create trusting workplaces where people feel safe enough to take risks and do great things together.

We talked about the limits of what an individual can do within the context of a toxic workplace, and how all of us can show up differently, even if there are systems in place designed to foster zero-sum competition rather than abundant generosity of spirit.

We explored how each of us can behave like a leader, going first and taking responsibility for changing our corner of the world, rather than waiting for "them" to fix things.

We looked at several powerful questions to ask ourselves on a regular basis, so that we can orient ourselves toward alliance rather than rivalry.

Enjoy!

Links

SkyeTeam

You Me We, by Barrett, Vesely, and Spencer

Ally Mindset Profile

"Community Game" vs "Stock Market Game" research