How Putting The Breaks on Sex & Dating Propelled Dronme Davis Into Loving Herself

“My style was this monument to my toxic relationship with the patriarchy and my concept of what women are supposed to look like. When I decided to take a break from dating and sex... It changed my relationship with my body . . . Being partnered can be beautiful, but getting to know yourself is so much better.”

Dronme Davis grappled heavily with her self esteem when confronted by a world that told her she wasn’t enough. As a bi-racial, curvy, “too hairy and emotionally unfiltered” tween and teen, Dronme often felt unseen, unheard, misunderstood or unsafe. Whether it be at her mostly white high school, in her conservative town growing up, her Black activist community in college or the white supremacist fashion and beauty culture she grew up in, Dronme never felt like she belonged. It wasn’t until she committed to a no sex or dating lifestyle, that Dronme discovered true freedom within her style, body, mind and spirit.

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“I spent so much time punishing her [my body] and trying to force her to adhere to the standard of beauty that was not only completely out of reach and impossible, but also objectively pretty overrated. And so now I'm just letting her [my body] do whatever she needs to do. I feel like I'm in the process of letting out this massive, murky, deep polluted breath that I've been holding since I was like 10.”

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