Setting boundaries might feel uncomfortable and sound callous, but best-selling author Melissa Urban believes setting boundaries is one of the kindest things you can do in any relationship.

In this chat with Fearne, Melissa explains how to start small when it comes to learning to set boundaries – casually saying ‘no’ to another glass of wine, for example – before moving on to setting boundaries with people in your life who might be seriously draining your energy. Plus, she tells Fearne why over-explaining often makes our lives more difficult.

Melissa’s book, ‘The Book of Boundaries: Set the limits that will set you free’, is out now from Vermilion. 

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