In this session, Dr. Tracy and Matthew Frey discuss a crucial issue that affects many relationships: defensiveness. They explore how defensiveness not only creates barriers but also diminishes and invalidates your partner's feelings. Matthew shares a personal revelation from his own life, noting how his failure to validate his wife's experiences contributed significantly to the deterioration of their marriage. He highlights that understanding doesn't require agreement but rather a mindful consideration of another's perspective. 

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Mini Session 1: Navigating Defensiveness in Relationships with Matthew Frey

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In this mini session, Dr. Tracy and her husband Greg debunk the myth of "Happy Wife, Happy Life." They argue that true happiness in a relationship should not come at the expense of one's own well-being. They emphasize the importance of having difficult conversations and maintaining a genuine friendship within the relationship. They also touch on the necessity of self-awareness and curiosity in resolving conflicts and highlight that we can only control our responses, not our partner's actions. Ultimately, they stress the importance of authenticity and mutual respect in building a healthy, balanced relationship.

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Mini Session 4: Debunking the Myth of "Happy Wife, Happy Life" with Greg Stewart

In a world where we're encouraged to prioritize individualism, and set boundaries, the importance of our relationships can often get lost. In this week's episode, Dr. Tracy chats with Dr. Stan Tatkin, a renowned clinician, researcher, and author of the bestselling book "Wired for Love." They explore the concept of interdependence in relationships, using the three-legged race analogy to highlight the importance of teamwork. Dr. Tatkin emphasizes understanding our own and our partner's brains to foster secure and functioning relationships, addressing the impact of negativity bias and the pitfalls of social media diagnoses. They touch on secure attachment, the couple bubble, and aligning on priorities for lasting connections. Dr. Tatkin shares insights on conflict resolution, mutual relief during disagreements, and maintaining a strong partnership through mutual sensitivity and understanding. This conversation offers practical advice and profound insights to help listeners build resilient and loving relationships, highlighting why it's actually ok to put your relationship at the top of the priority list. 
 
Be sure to follow Dr. Stan on Instagram and grab a copy of “Wired for Love” here.  

Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here! 

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You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   
Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      
Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  
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Putting Your Relationship First with Dr. Stan Tatkin

In this week's mini session, Dr. Tracy is joined by Dr. Morgan Anderson to discuss the challenges of relationship repair through the lens of attachment styles. They explore how individuals with anxious attachment struggle with distance, often engaging in anxious pursuit and abandoning their own needs to regain a sense of safety. These individuals must learn to self-soothe, such as by taking a walk or doing a task, and become comfortable with discomfort. Whereas those with avoidant attachment deactivate their feelings and needs, pushing away closeness and often wanting to sweep conflicts under the rug. For the avoidantly attached individuals, the focus should be on self-soothing while learning to turn toward their partner, asking for reassurance, and setting clear boundaries. Both attachment styles face unique challenges in repairing relationships, but understanding and addressing these patterns can lead to healthier and more resilient connections.

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Mini Session 3: Attachment Styles and Conflict Resolution with Dr. Morgan Anderson

In this week's solo episode, Dr. Tracy tackles a topic that affects many of us but is also something that is very near and dear to her heart, and that is perfectionism. She explains how perfectionism is more than a desire to do well, often becoming a relentless pursuit of flawlessness that can harm our mental health and relationships. Dr. Tracy explores the internal and external roots of perfectionism and introduces the concept of urge surfing, a technique used to manage the impulse to be perfect. She shares five practical tips for managing perfectionism that have helped her: raising awareness, stepping into discomfort, practicing self-compassion, challenging negative self-talk, and embracing acceptance. Through her personal experiences and professional expertise, she aims to provide support to listeners in navigating their struggles with perfectionism to foster a healthier, more balanced life. 
 
Links:  
Download Dr. Tracy’s free guide to overcoming imposter syndrome at www.drtracyd.com/imposter 
If you are looking to find clarity in your business and want to sign up for the Empower Her retreat you can visit www.drtracyd.com/retreat 

 A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!
ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.
Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.
Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.com

Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here! 
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How to Overcome Perfectionism

Are you dealing with a narcissist or someone with chronically defensive tendencies? In this session, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Jaime Zuckerman explore the key differences between a chronically defensive person (non-narcissist) and a full-blown narcissist. The session delves into the behavioral contrasts, highlighting that defensive partners lack malicious intent, whereas narcissists are often intentionally harmful. To wrap up, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Jaime offer insights on managing relationships with both non-narcissistic and narcissistic partners. 

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Mini Session 1: Navigating Defensiveness in Relationships with Matthew Frey

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