No Holes Barred

By Knee Deep In Life, Victoria Emes

What's No Holes Barred about?

Unfiltered convos from two potty mouthed birds trying to find light in the lesser spoken realities of womanhood and beyond. Send us your stories for a chance to be featured in the podcast.

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101 ratings

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LAST EPISODE

Ep 136. Choo choo train of ...

05.22.2023

In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic shares her romantic wedding anniversary celebration and both Laura and Vic share their choo choo train of pleasure celeb line up while trying not to over complicate things with emotions. They ...

No Holes Barred episodes:

05.22.2023 Ep 136. Choo choo train of pleasure In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic shares her romantic wedding anniversary celebration and both Laura and Vic share their choo choo train of pleasure celeb line up while trying not to over complicate things with emotions. They ...
05.16.2023 Ep. 135 Dim the lights, dim the minge On this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Vic & Laura discuss the thrilling topic of clover lawns, revel in Laura's Mary Poppins like qualities when she's interacting with other peoples kids and take questions from their lovely audience. This ...
05.09.2023 Ep 134. Not my assignment mate In this weeks' episode of No Holes Barred, Vic and Laura go all green fingered and discuss lawns in far too much depth, we hear from a lady who accidentally empties her bowels in front of the window cleaner and ...
05.02.2023 Ep 133. Veronica Eels In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic shares the time her work casually called her by a different name for 9 months without realising and they share their intense frustration at the irrelevant questions of children over things ...
04.24.2023 Ep 132. Grief wank In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura share stories of friendship sex highs and lows. They both reflect on their own experiences of it as well as some listeners experiences. They talk grief wanking and and ...
04.18.2023 Ep. 131 Big heart, even bigger minge In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura reunite after a 3 week hiatus thanks to the Easter hols and Laura trip to Thailand. They break down the highs and lows of the school break including Vics ...
04.10.2023 Ep 130. Dominatrix Special with Betty On this weeks episode of No Holes Barred, Vic & Laura chat to a very special guest about her job as a Dominatrix! We chat all things relating to the role of being a dominatrix, from the logistics of fisting, ...
04.03.2023 Ep. 129 Attack of the faecal On this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Vic shares her close shave with an angry Alsatian, Laura shares her debut foray into doing stand up comedy and the girls discuss whether it's possible to recover from having explosive guts ...
03.28.2023 Ep. 128 Cum run In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic talks through how terrible decision to heavily drink the night before mothers day and she reads out a bit of sexy time that goes wrong in a graveyard. Laura then admits ...
03.21.2023 Ep 127. Apple Pied Off In this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Laura and Vic revisit the phantom potato thrower, discuss whether a racoon could fit in a bum and get a voicenote about a one night stand gone wrong. This episode is sponsored ...
03.14.2023 Ep. 126 Swingers Special In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura welcome some guests to the podcast who are in a relationship together and also swingers. They give an insight into the world of sex clubs and open relationships and ...
03.07.2023 Ep. 125 Nan Slag In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura discuss their weekends and surviving one socially awkward encounter at a time. They talk anal sex that leads to a hospital visit and how this show literally rendered an ...
02.28.2023 Ep 124. French Wank In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic tells her tales of wow that while she might have escaped her children for a night of passion, she was instantly met with the reality of parenthood as soon as she ...
02.21.2023 Ep. 123 Googly Eyes On this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Laura and Vic discuss their eventful half terms, Vic nurses a massive hangover, and they delve deep into the art of dirty talk. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy ...
02.14.2023 EP. 122 Tramadol, Candida, Kimchi In this weeks episode of No Holes Barred, Laura & Vic discuss the importance of always reading medical guidance when it comes to taking prescription drugs, imagine a Candida fuelled apocalypse and give some potentially dubious advice about how to ...
02.07.2023 Ep 120. Pube on a plate In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Laura talks about the horror of her discovery over a pubic hair in her chips from a local take away and Vic confesses to not having an issue with strangers bodily hair ...
01.31.2023 Ep 119. All arse no hole In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Laura describes the exact moment she carelessly tickles a strange man's ear with her free and wild tit on a water slide and Vic talks cum sounds radiating the walls of her ...
01.24.2023 Ep 118. Dildos at the dump In this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Laura & Vic explore the logistics of recycling old sex toys, reveal what massive coffee snobs they are and chat about the journey to finding body acceptance. This episode is sponsored by ...
01.17.2023 Ep. 117 Slags R Us In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic takes a trip down memory lane where an old flame forwards her a letter she has sent to him while they dated as teens as she recants her passive aggressive tone ...
01.10.2023 Ep 116. The House Shitter In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura talk monogamy, house shitting and the mums of this world who are prepared to phish out a condom stuck up their daughters friends minge. They read a story that ...
01.03.2023 Ep. 115 Bum bomb In this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Laura & Vic discuss their new year resolutions for 2023, question how a WW11 bomb ended up an 88 year old mans back passage, and discuss the wild abandon of Mums nights ...
12.27.2022 Ep 114. 2022 Round up! This week's episode of NHB looks back at some of the gems from 2022 - what a year it's been! Keep sending in your stories to [email protected] and follow us on Insta. Back next week with a bang. Happy New ...
12.20.2022 Ep 113. I wish my minge looked like yours In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura get ready for the festive season of Christmas with bitching about their husbands and children. They receive a story of how a sleeping piss can leave a carpet smelling ...
12.13.2022 Ep 112. Sleeve on the minge In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura discuss post night out shenanigans where Laura exposed herself to a London highstreet and Vic sexually aroused by Laura's aerolas as well as being so shit faced she did ...
12.06.2022 Ep. 109 Let the pee flow, let the poo go In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura unpack the shoe trauma of a Hobbs brogue in London after Laura's unfortunate decision to go into the big smoke choosing style over comfort. They promise to put up ...
11.29.2022 108. Big Bulbous Minge In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura talk periods, people pleasing and carpal tunnel. They get a story from yet another one night stand confession that'll leave you wondering did the cat ever make it back ...
11.22.2022 Ep 107. Turd baguette In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura discuss the challenges of balancing life as a parent and sexy time. Vic escaped for a weekend of passion and Laura managed to break her glasses in the heat ...
11.15.2022 EP 106. The Exorcism In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura discuss horny goat weed and why Vic hasn't got it in her to get down and dirty in the living room with the lights on while Laura confesses to ...
11.08.2022 Ep. 105 No thanks piss dick In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura talk about a little trip to Brighton they took to watch Laura debut her Talent of stand up comedy as well as her horrifically awkward social anxiety around new ...
11.01.2022 Ep 104. Clits up Ep 104. Clits up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
10.23.2022 Ep. 103 Gorgonzola In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura discuss why cats are utterly terrifying and also useful if you're in the market for a beautiful floral arrangement from the local graveyard, or a used butt plug. They ...
10.18.2022 Ep 102. Releasing the nuggets to Nemo In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura talk about tattoos, including an ASDA bum stamp on one Scottish mum looking for love and why you should never trust the sea, because you're one wave away from ...
10.11.2022 Ep 101 Squirrel willy Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
10.03.2022 Ep 100. All hail the nugget In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura celebrate their 100th episode- without mentioning it once because they didn't even realise. They bring back an old favourite feature, "Have you heard?" and chat about the logistics of ...
09.26.2022 Ep 99 Death by Dildo In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura talk about how they'd happily be front line and center to a dildo truck crash just to get a front row seat watching rubber dicks flying across the road. ...
09.13.2022 Ep 98. I like a stiff foam On this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Vic and Laura discuss the logistics of measuring of your own genitals with computer cables, share what ridiculous misdemeanours they got up to in their youth and share why you should never ...
09.06.2022 Ep 97. Professor of his bumhole In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura arrive slightly later than usual for a Tuesday but dive right into why a woman orgasming via the clit is a load of old bollocks. They also have some ...
08.29.2022 Ep. 96 A look back In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura take a little break from recording and have pulled together some of the hilarious stories received over time including one that's never been aired. While they would love to ...
08.23.2022 Ep 95. Maggot up the minge In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic decides to change things up and share a new article with Laura which could possibly be the best to date. They are asked by a listener if their social anxiety has ...
08.15.2022 Ep. 94 Living on the rim Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
08.09.2022 Ep 93. Lasagne loving This week on No Holes Barred, Laura & Vic discuss listeners dating disasters, from unsolicited dick pics to skid marks on bedsheets and reveal why lasagne can be fatal if used inappropriately. Follow us on Instagram at @no_holes_barred_podcast Hosted on ...
08.02.2022 Ep.92 Trauma Trump In this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Vic and Laura get back to the basics of what this podcast is about - pure escapism with a heavy side order of smut. They asked the listeners on Instagram what you ...
07.26.2022 Ep. 91 The tale of the fingered bald minge In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura hear one of the funniest voice note confessions to date from a trainee beautician and discuss the art of pooing whilst standing up. They finish on a agony aunt ...
07.17.2022 Ep 90. A bum note In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura try to tactfully give gentle advice to a exhausted mum that she's probably going to be exhausted for a whole lot longer. They give some home truths to the ...
07.12.2022 Ep 89. Flighty bitch and miserable cow In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Laura listens to Vics endless tales of woe that even left her husband labelling her a miserable cow. They hear from the brave public toilet pooper who was left caught short with ...
07.05.2022 Ep. 88 A Zepplin bullet In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura talk about the painful truth around bum grapes/hemroids/piles and how vic nearly shat her anal suppositories on a 5 year olds head in the park. In yet another bum ...
06.27.2022 Ep 87 I predict a riot In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic and Laura discuss the recent news of Americas new ruling regarding abortions and also try to offer advice over contraception in a week of some real girl chat about masturation, the ...
06.20.2022 Ep 86. But I'm not bitter In this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Vic and Laura read a message from a disgruntled listener and delicately tackle the mature response of how to respond to criticism.... they also throw caution to ANYONE who wishes to remain ...
06.14.2022 Ep 85. Hint of Musk In this week's episode of No Holes Barred, Vic and Laura dish out another trigger warning over the continued discussion of abortion after the huge influx of women responding to the open chat from last week that will hopefully continue ...
06.07.2022 Ep 84. Pile poppers In this week's episode of No Holes Barred Vic tells Laura of a woeful start to her birthday with an aggressive pile, diarrhea and sickness along side a cheeky little bit of child tantruming in-between. This week's episode comes with ...

Older episodes

No Holes Barred

What's No Holes Barred about?

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No Holes Barred episodes:

Ep 136. Choo choo train of pleasure

Ep. 135 Dim the lights, dim the minge

Ep 134. Not my assignment mate

Ep 133. Veronica Eels

Ep 132. Grief wank

Ep. 131 Big heart, even bigger minge

Ep 130. Dominatrix Special with Betty

Ep. 129 Attack of the faecal

Ep. 128 Cum run

Ep 127. Apple Pied Off

Ep. 126 Swingers Special

Ep. 125 Nan Slag

Ep 124. French Wank

Ep. 123 Googly Eyes

EP. 122 Tramadol, Candida, Kimchi

Ep 120. Pube on a plate

Ep 119. All arse no hole

Ep 118. Dildos at the dump

Ep. 117 Slags R Us

Ep 116. The House Shitter

Ep. 115 Bum bomb

Ep 114. 2022 Round up!

Ep 113. I wish my minge looked like yours

Ep 112. Sleeve on the minge

Ep. 109 Let the pee flow, let the poo go

108. Big Bulbous Minge

Ep 107. Turd baguette

EP 106. The Exorcism

Ep. 105 No thanks piss dick

Ep 104. Clits up

Ep. 103 Gorgonzola

Ep 102. Releasing the nuggets to Nemo

Ep 101 Squirrel willy

Ep 100. All hail the nugget

Ep 99 Death by Dildo

Ep 98. I like a stiff foam

Ep 97. Professor of his bumhole

Ep. 96 A look back

Ep 95. Maggot up the minge

Ep. 94 Living on the rim

Ep 93. Lasagne loving

Ep.92 Trauma Trump

Ep. 91 The tale of the fingered bald minge

Ep 90. A bum note

Ep 89. Flighty bitch and miserable cow

Ep. 88 A Zepplin bullet

Ep 87 I predict a riot

Ep 86. But I'm not bitter

Ep 85. Hint of Musk

Ep 84. Pile poppers