Dan is joined by Dr. Laura Anderson, a fellow spiritual abuse/religious trauma researcher whose new book When Religion Hurts You is a pretty great and concise summary of what is known today about religious trauma and its effects on humans. They define terms like “religious trauma” and “spiritual abuse” and talk about the benefits of religion, the failures of pop psychology, the difference between PTSD and Complex PTSD, and more.

Laura’s Book “When Religion Hurts You: Healing from Religious Trauma and the Impact of High-Control Religion”:
https://drlauraeanderson.com/book

Laura’s Website: https://drlauraeanderson.com/

https://www.traumaresolutionandrecovery.com/

Laura’s Podcast - Sunday School Dropouts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sunday-school-dropouts/id1689312239

The Varieties of Religious & Spiritual Abuse Episode with Paula Swindle (#90): 
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/you-have-permission/id1448000113?i=1000498837671

Saved By the City Podcast: 
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/saved-by-the-city/id1557930520

___________________________________________
Follow Dan on IG: www.instagram.com/dancoke/
Or Twitter: twitter.com/DanKoch
Faith deconstruction resources: www.soyouredeconstructing.com/
Edited by Josh Gilbert (joshgilbertmedia.com -- he is accepting more work!)
Email about the "sliding scale" for the Patreon: youhavepermissionpodcast@gmail.com
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When Religion Hurts You (#229)

So many of us have been given bad answers to good questions -- questions about God, suffering, prayer, fate, science, justice, and more -- often by people with pure intentions. But we needn't stop with those pat answers. You have permission to take both Christianity and the modern world very seriously, and this podcast will introduce you to people from across the Christian spectrum engaging these timeless and difficult questions in various ways.

Religion & Spirituality

Other

Spirituality

Christianity

Buddhism

Hinduism

Judaism

Islam

The spiritual education of children can be daunting, especially when parents have more questions about God than answers. Does this necessarily lead to a dead end, or are there tools available when we have very little “bedrock” on which to stand?

Meredith Anne Miller feels that mainstream Christian children's education focuses too heavily on making kids obedient, rather than inviting exploration. Meredith advocates for an approach centered on wonder, curiosity, and relationship -- sharing about God's character and love while making ample space for kids' questions, doubts, and personal journeys.

We also respond to a listener question about specific issues with the Lord’s Prayer as a standard family/bedtime option.

**Watch this episode on YouTube**
https://youtu.be/19GZZaSYZwU

Meredith’s Substack:
https://meredithannemiller.substack.com/

Other YHP Episodes around Raising Kids:
#174 Meredith Miller - “Helping Kids Know God in Healthy Ways”:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/you-have-permission/id1448000113?i=1000594695988

#166 Bekah McNeil - “Love & Perfectionism in Raising Kids”:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/you-have-permission/id1448000113?i=1000582889496

____________________________________
REGISTER for THEOLOGY BEER CAMP:
https://homebrewedchristianity.lpages.co/theology-beer-camp-24/
YHP use code "RETURNOFYHP" for $25 off your ticket!
____________________

Follow Dan on IG: www.instagram.com/dancoke/
Or Twitter: twitter.com/DanKoch
Faith deconstruction resources: www.soyouredeconstructing.com/
Edited by Josh Gilbert (joshgilbertmedia.com -- he is accepting more work!)
Join the Patreon for exclusive episodes (and more) every month: patreon.com/dankoch
Email about the "sliding scale" for the Patreon: youhavepermissionpodcast@gmail.com
YHP Patron-only FB group: tinyurl.com/ycvbbf98
Website: www.dankochwords.com/yhp.html
Join Dan's email list: www.dankochwords.com/
Artwork by sprungle.co/
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How Can Deconstructing Parents Talk About God? (#257)

I was joined by editor, podcaster, and novelist Jason Kirk to discuss how he put his Evangelical upbringing — barely distinguishable from my own — into his recent novel Hell Is A World Without You. We also discussed the power of storytelling to capture the overlap of complex ideas, fear of Hell, queer affirmation, Dune, and more. 

**Watch this episode on YouTube**
https://youtu.be/69-5jPEmrBE

Jason’s Book “ Hell Is a World Without You”: https://www.amazon.com/Hell-World-Without-Jason-Kirk/dp/1735492647

https://www.jasonkirk.fyi/p/novel

“Pretty Good Vibrations” Episode mentioned - Further Seems Forever Deep Dive:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/pretty-good-vibrations/id1652779250?i=1000651894374

___________________
REGISTER for THEOLOGY BEER CAMP:
https://homebrewedchristianity.lpages.co/theology-beer-camp-24/
YHP use code "RETURNOFYHP" for $25 off your ticket!
____________________
Follow Dan on IG: www.instagram.com/dancoke/
Or Twitter: twitter.com/DanKoch
Faith deconstruction resources: www.soyouredeconstructing.com/
Edited by Josh Gilbert (joshgilbertmedia.com -- he is accepting more work!)
Join the Patreon for exclusive episodes (and more) every month: patreon.com/dankoch
Email about the "sliding scale" for the Patreon: youhavepermissionpodcast@gmail.com
YHP Patron-only FB group: tinyurl.com/ycvbbf98
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Join Dan's email list: www.dankochwords.com/
Artwork by sprungle.co/
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How to Write a Post-Evangelical Novel (#256)

On this week’s episode, I spoke with Elias Dummer, a musician, marketer, and former singer-songwriter of the Canadian Christian rock band The City Harmonic. We talked about the power and potential of contemporary worship music, exploring its role as a "spiritual technology" and its ability to unite people across various divisions -- class, race, theology, etc. And yes, in case you are wondering, I had to set aside my own personal distaste for Contemporary Christian Music and worship music, but I was happy to do so, all in the name of science, of course!

Elias shared his unique background, coming from an ecumenical, missional context rather than a typical megachurch setting. I liked how this challenged common assumptions about contemporary worship music and its association with private piety and white Evangelical tribalism.

We delved into the research Elias and others are doing about worship music, touching on concepts like Emile Durkheim’s collective effervescence and the ability of music to manipulate emotions. Acknowledging the power that worship leaders hold can help them use this influence responsibly. We agreed that being transparent about the mechanisms at play can help protect people from potential harm and abuse.

Dan’s old band “Pacific Gold”:
https://open.spotify.com/artist/5JiCHmso7KrIrNdhjRuElw?si=DOHu-J1wTyeQ6Rh7ET565g

Elias’s Band “The City Harmonic” on Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/artist/6qAVoMGl7omcu0RhX1B3fm?si=XTVkEntjSyuMSDLM1zjNlw

The City Harmonic’s “Manifesto” on Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/track/5PsxiztPCYZUcEkXmYSx8Q?si=f921612d70464c32

Elias’ IG @eliasdummer

**Watch this episode on YouTube**
https://youtu.be/7D-lyxdwDQs
____________________
Follow Dan on IG: www.instagram.com/dancoke/
Or Twitter: twitter.com/DanKoch
Faith deconstruction resources: www.soyouredeconstructing.com/
Edited by Josh Gilbert (joshgilbertmedia.com -- he is accepting more work!)
Join the Patreon for exclusive episodes (and more) every month: patreon.com/dankoch
Email about the "sliding scale" for the Patreon: youhavepermissionpodcast@gmail.com
YHP Patron-only FB group: tinyurl.com/ycvbbf98
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I Don’t Like Worship Music, But It Works (#255)

In this conversation, Tim Whitaker of The New Evangelicals joins Dan for a dual-feed special episode to discuss the upcoming book by Richard B. Hays, a respected New Testament scholar (Duke), and his son Christopher (Fuller), titled 'The Widening of God's Mercy: A Thoroughly Biblical Account of LGBTQ Affirmation in the Church.' They explore the potential impact of the book and the various reactions it has received. They also discuss the importance of acknowledging the harm caused by previous non-affirming positions and the need for an apology. They consider the strategic implications of the book and its potential to shift the conversation in white Evangelical spaces. They highlight the importance of listening to the voices of queer Christian scholars and the potential for the book to provide validation and support for those navigating their faith and sexuality. Also, they explore the idea of holding contradictory views and the importance of integration and growth, including a little bit of therapy-adjacent ideas about Tim and his dad.

https://www.thenewevangelicals.com/

**Watch this episode on YouTube**
https://youtu.be/bEdcKuNfHg8

Richard Hays’ Book “The Widening of God’s Mercy”:
https://yalebooks.yale.edu/book/9780300273427/the-widening-of-gods-mercy/

____________________
Follow Dan on IG: www.instagram.com/dancoke/
Or Twitter: twitter.com/DanKoch
Faith deconstruction resources: www.soyouredeconstructing.com/
Edited by Josh Gilbert (joshgilbertmedia.com -- he is accepting more work!)
Join the Patreon for exclusive episodes (and more) every month: patreon.com/dankoch
Email about the "sliding scale" for the Patreon: youhavepermissionpodcast@gmail.com
YHP Patron-only FB group: tinyurl.com/ycvbbf98
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A New Queer-Affirming Book & Its Fallout (with The New Evangelicals) (#254)

Dan spoke with friend and frequent guest Sarey Martin Concepcion about the intersection of intellectual humility and our Christian faith journeys, attempting to tie this together with his recent set of “Still Christian” episodes. They discussed how Sarey was raised in a fundamentalist evangelical strain of Christianity that valued certainty and correct doctrinal beliefs above all else. This made it challenging to embrace intellectual humility -- acknowledging what one can and cannot be confident about.

While appreciating the research around intellectual humility can create some real tensions within Christianity, it also provides a foundation for extending grace to ourselves and others amid disagreement and uncertainty.

 https://www.tidycocreative.com/

Other Intellectual Humility Episodes:
Elizabeth Hall: Doubt, Intellectual Humility & Uncertainty Tolerance (#146)
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/you-have-permission/id1448000113?i=1000553166878

Joshua Hook: Intellectual Humility (#184)
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/you-have-permission/id1448000113?i=1000608179436

Daryl van Tongeren: You Are Not Your Beliefs (#195)
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/you-have-permission/id1448000113?i=1000618349369

Stephen Sandage: What Does a Healthy Spiritual Leader Even Look Like? (#209)
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/you-have-permission/id1448000113?i=1000627460605
____________________
Follow Dan on IG: www.instagram.com/dancoke/
Or Twitter: twitter.com/DanKoch
Faith deconstruction resources: www.soyouredeconstructing.com/
Edited by Josh Gilbert (joshgilbertmedia.com -- he is accepting more work!)
Join the Patreon for exclusive episodes (and more) every month: patreon.com/dankoch
Email about the "sliding scale" for the Patreon: youhavepermissionpodcast@gmail.com
YHP Patron-only FB group: tinyurl.com/ycvbbf98
Website: www.dankochwords.com/yhp.html
Join Dan's email list: www.dankochwords.com/
Artwork by sprungle.co/
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When Religion Hurts You (#229)

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