EPISODE 005: Burn the Approval Addiction Before It Burns You

Let me give it to you straight.

If you're still chasing approval, still tweaking your tone, filtering your truth, or overdelivering just to be seen as "good enough"...

You’re not leading. You’re performing. And the price is your power and all the things that needing approval will get you, like toxic relationships and attracting many of the pieces of your life that you’re trying to now hold together.

Approval isn’t innocent. It’s an addiction. And high-achieving women? We’re the most high-functioning addicts on the planet.

This episode isn’t about being liked. It’s about being free. It’s about burning the approval contract you never consciously signed, but have been upholding with your body, your business, and your boundaries.

Here we go.

Here’s the thing no one wants to admit: approval feels good. It’s a high. A hit. A fix.

That quick dopamine rush you get when someone tells you you're impressive? When they say you're so strong, so reliable, so polished?

That’s not just validation. That’s chemical. And like any drug, it builds dependence.

For most high-achieving women, it started early, you learned that praise was the fastest way to avoid pain.

So you became the overachiever. The reliable one. The girl who could handle anything.

But here’s the truth:

You’re not addicted to being admired. You’re addicted to being safe.

Because approval became your security blanket. Your evidence that you were doing enough. Being enough. Holding it together.

And when you don’t get it? You question your worth.

Let’s be clear: that’s not leadership. That’s a trauma bond with performance.

Every yes that wasn’t aligned? Every smile you forced? Every time you said “I’ve got it” when your nervous system was already screaming for rest?

That was a withdrawal from your internal bank.

And now?

This is how burnout sneaks in. Not just physical exhaustion, soul fatigue. That gnawing resentment that builds every time you abandon yourself to be acceptable.

Chronic fatigue. Brain fog. Emotional numbness. These aren't random symptoms. They're receipts.

Proof that you’ve been paying in self-abandonment to buy external approval.

And the cost? Your sovereignty.

So let’s rebuild. But this time, from truth, not tolerance.

Your new authority? You.

Not the client. Not the partner. Not the family you still feel pressure to impress.

You.

If your body says no, it’s a no. If your energy says "not this," then you don’t override it just to be seen as nice, helpful, or humble.

Approving of your own standard is the most radical act of leadership. Because when you lock into it, the noise stops. The push stops. The addiction starts to unravel.

And suddenly?

You’re no longer waiting for applause. You’re building from authority.

Not the loud, performative kind. The quiet kind. The kind that doesn’t flinch when no one claps.

Ok, so now let’s get crystal clear.

Where are you still seeking permission? Scan your life, your offers, your pricing, your social voice, your relationships.

Anywhere you’re watering yourself down is where approval is still in charge.

Now take it deeper:

What’s the praise you’re still unconsciously chasing? What identity have you wrapped around being "the strong one," "the one who never complains," "the one who always comes through"?

And here’s the hardest part: who are you still being loyal to, out of guilt, fear, or obligation?

Because sometimes the most dangerous chains are made of gold. Approval looks like loyalty. But it’s really bondage.

It’s time to cut that proverbial chord.

You don’t owe the past version of you anything, I hope you get that. You owe the woman you’re becoming everything.

This week, your practice is simple, but it will stretch you. And we love that, don't we?

One refusal per day. One place where you say no. One moment where you hold the line, even if your nervous system starts to shake.

It might be:

Whatever it is, say the thing. Without apology. Without softening. Without the need to clean it up after.

And when your body resists, because it will,  know this:

That’s not danger. That’s detox. That’s your system learning a new safety code. And every time you honor that edge, you reclaim energy that’s been bleeding into approval loops for years.

Let me remind you: you were never too much. You were just too real for a world addicted to performance.

You don’t need to be more palatable. You don’t need to be easier to digest.

You need to be free.

Free from the guilt that taught you to shrink. Free from the applause addiction that made you betray yourself. Free from the belief that power is only safe when it's quiet and agreeable.

The next level of your life and leadership will not be accessed through approval. It will be built through unapologetic self-acceptance and embodied self-leadership.

This is The Rewired to Rise™ podcast. You’re not here to be liked. You’re here to be remembered.

I’ll see you next week.

If you want to take this deeper, head over to
👉 rewiredtorisepodcast.com/episodes

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It’s time to lead without the leash of approval.

Your truth isn’t too much. It’s the medicine the world has been waiting for.

Let’s rise together.