Catholic confessional sex stories, military consent training, and the differences between inclusionary and exclusionary consent—Dr. Emma Smith shares her journey from shame to sex therapy, radical honesty in relationships, and helping couples open up with care and curiosity.

📈 STATS | 42 bisexual pansexual cis-presenting agender femme, she/her and any/all pronouns, in a monogamish relationship, raised Catholic, sexual assault survivor, AASECT certified sex therapist in private practice, writer, intimacy philosopher, advocate for sexual trauma survivors to enjoy sex, from New Jersey, based in Nashville, into: infusing eroticism into daily life, sharing truths and curiosities about sex with partners in playful ways, extended foreplay to build anticipation long before touch is initiated, unlocking shame stories, building sensory awareness and self-trust through solo touch exploration.

⏰ TIME CODE

00:00 From Catholic schoolgirl to sex therapist and intimacy philosopher

06:19 Coming out in her 30s, a Marine husband’s reaction, and her mom’s allyship

13:04 Defining sexy as authenticity and what her 42-year-old sex life looks like

16:17 Radical honesty, trauma work, and positive sentiment override

24:04 Timeouts, nervous system regulation, and timing back in

27:18 Monogamy, expansive love, and health practices around testing

34:10 Sex therapy: trauma recovery, couples work, and sex as the canary in the coal mine

38:16 Helping couples open up with relationship agreement intensives

42:15 Virgin Mary statues, masturbation shame, and “transactional” sex

58:11 Confession booth stories and Catholic guilt through college

59:29 Teaching Marines consent by valuing their own bodies

1:13:12 From trauma counseling to sex therapy and post-traumatic growth

1:16:36 Responsive vs. spontaneous desire and the myth of “spontaneity”

1:19:04 Releasing inherited shame stories

1:21:35 Believing people when they tell you who they are and allowing evolution

1:22:57 Spreading ripples of love by celebrating small creative acts as miraculous

🤩 TOPICS | AASECT certified sex therapist, allyship and coming out stories, authenticity in relationships, awareness through masturbation and solo touch, betrayal trauma therapy, bisexual femme perspective, body trust and self-awareness, Catholic guilt and purity culture, Catholic upbringing and Virgin Mary statue, charcuterie board therapy intensives, communication skills in couples, consent training for Marines, couples counseling and sex therapy, creative acts as love and miracles, daily eroticism practices, erotic embodiment and pleasure, extended foreplay for anticipation, fluid bonding conversations, health and STI testing practices, infidelity recovery and healing, intimacy philosophy and writing, masturbation shame and guilt, military sex education programs, nervous system regulation in relationships, non-monogamy frameworks and polyamory, orgasmic embodiment and desire, polyamorous relationship dynamics, post-traumatic growth and sexuality, power of curiosity and playfulness, purity ring and chastity culture, radical transparency and honesty, relationship agreements for opening up, responsive versus spontaneous desire, self-trust building through touch, sexual assault prevention training, sexual trauma recovery and healing, shame release exercises, soft yes consent framework, spontaneous desire myths and realities, survivor advocacy for sex positivity, therapy for betrayal and infidelity, trauma-informed counseling practices, valuing men’s consent and bodies, writing and intimacy philosophy.

🔗 DR EMMA LINKS | @emmasmithphd / @emmasmithphd.bsky.social / facebook / substack

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