I don't know about you, but I'm burned out from all the clichéd quotes about fear that fill up my newsfeed. While fear is a factor in one's lack of success, few people understand the fears that actually drive their behavior.

The obvious fears, such as the fear of public speaking, the fear of rejection, or the fear of dying, are rarely the fears that affect us most. In fact, the fears you talk about are probably just symptoms of other fears deep in your subconscious mind.

If you remain unaware of your unconscious fears, you won’t know why you avoid opportunities that would most benefit your health, happiness, career, business, or relationships.

I’ve observed five unconscious fears in co-workers, clients, network marketing business owners, friends, family, and of course, myself.

If you only scan the list, you will probably tell yourself you don’t have any of these fears. But, if you read through the full article, I have a feeling you’ll discover that at least one of the fears affects you more than you initially think.

Note: Throughout this article, I intentionally never use the phrase “face your fear.” To face your fear means you can look at it, stare it down, or become fully aware of it. It doesn't do you much good to just know that it's there. You have to change your mindset about the fear, or take action. If you don't, nothing will change.  

Fear of Failure

Why do you fear failure?

You assume the emotional pain from failing will hurt more than the pain of life remaining the same. Or, you fear that by failing, others might see you as "less than" -- less capable, skilled, credible, knowledgeable, successful, etc.

You’re not really afraid of the outcome. You’re afraid of how the outcome might make you feel.

And that is the core of the problem.

You believe the outcome of failure is a feeling.

What if, instead of believing that failure's outcome was a feeling, you believed its outcome was a lesson?

Think of the first time you tried completing a maze. You put the tip of your pen down on the paper and moved it from the start, into the maze. Eventually, you found yourself at a dead end.

Did you pick up your pen, throw the maze away, and feel like a failure? Did others judge you for making the wrong choice?

Of course not!

You kept your pen on the paper, backed away from the dead end, and found a new path. Perhaps you took another route that didn't work, or maybe you found your way through the maze. The point is, you didn't give up just because you took a wrong turn. You turned around and tried a new way forward.

Failure is just a temporary dead end.

Failure is merely a sign that you need to adjust your strategy, get stronger, try harder, ask for help, or improve your skills.

It was a beautiful, sunny, 80-degree morning in Longboat Key, Florida. I was at the driving range with a friend.

If you would have driven up to the range about 9:00 am that morning, you would have seen me crush a drive over 300 yards on the fly, straight as an arrow, down the middle of the range.

You might have thought, “Jeez, that guy must be a pro.”

But you would have made that judgment based only on a single shot, not knowing what success and failures led up to that drive that morning.

Before that nearly perfect drive, I shanked, hooked, chunked, sliced, and topped dozens of range balls.

After each shot, I paused and briefly reviewed my swing in my head to figure out what went wrong. With the next shot, I’d make a slight adjustment in my grip, swing speed, stance, or something else.

Little by little, my swing same together.

The last shot was the final result of learning from a lot of crappy shots, or a lot of failures.

Often, we see only the final shot from other people, after they post their status updates. We assume they have a special gift, or that they're blessed or lucky. We don't realize their success was the result taking a lot of shots that sucked, learning from them,