Mastering Midlife with Heidi

74. 5 Hard Truths About Being the ‘Nice One’ — and Why People Pleasing Pushes Others Away


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What if your “niceness” is actually pushing people away?

In this powerful episode, I unpack a viral Reddit post where one woman asked, “Please just help me understand why people pleasers are disliked.” The 29 pages of raw, honest responses revealed painful truths about what people-pleasing really looks like from the outside — and why it keeps us stuck in guilt, exhaustion, and disconnection.

I break down five hard truths about people-pleasing — how it can come across as fake, create weak boundaries, attract toxic people, and erode your sense of self. You’ll learn why saying “yes” when you mean “no” teaches people how to treat you, and how to start reclaiming your peace and power, one honest boundary at a time.

I also share a touching tribute to Diane Keaton, who reminded us that, “The goal is to continue in good and bad, all of it.” Because healing isn’t about getting it right — it’s about showing up real, even when it’s messy.

🎧 Listen now to learn what your ‘niceness’ might really be costing you—and how to take your life back.

👇Free resources:

Book a call with me here: Heidi's calendar

Take the Boundaries Blind Spot Quiz here

Download the guide: 20 Ways to Say No Without Feeling Guilty

Send us a text

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Mastering Midlife with HeidiBy Heidi Gustafson

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