What does it feel like to check every box, reach every milestone, and still feel like something is deeply wrong?

Coco Duan was a senior leader at a Fortune 500 company, earning over $400k a year, doing everything she was supposed to do. On the outside, high performance. On the inside, running on empty, living in low-grade anxiety she didn't even have a name for, and giving everything to everyone except herself.

COVID stopped the superhighway. And for the first time, the whisper she had been outrunning for years got loud enough to hear.

In this conversation, Coco and Victoria talk about what actually happens after you get off the highway: why the anxiety doesn't automatically stop, why high achievers keep chasing the next goal to feel safe even when they know better, and why the nervous system work has to come before the strategy. Coco also talks about Argentine Tango as nervous system regulation, dancing five nights a week in Shanghai, and going to Buenos Aires for three weeks because joy is not a luxury. It is the fuel.

Her book Unchecking the Boxes is out now. Her podcast is The Badass Leader. And this conversation is for anyone who has ever felt like a beautiful Porsche running on a broken engine.

CHAPTERS
00:00 Welcome and Introducing Coco Duan

00:38 Who Coco Is Now: Breaking Good Girl Patterns and Becoming Badass

01:52 The Inciting Incident: When Did the Whisper Start?

02:27 From Whisper to Shout: How COVID Made the Voice Impossible to Ignore

04:42 Life on the Corporate Superhighway: Urgent, Urgent, Urgent

05:28 Driving 100 Miles an Hour While Running Completely Empty

07:24 The Turning Point: Seeking Professional Help for the First Time

10:54 How She Found Coaching: The Glimmer That Changed Everything

14:45 Zone of Excellence vs Zone of Genius: Why Good at It Is Not Enough

15:13 Building Financial Safety Before Taking the Leap

16:51 Hiding in the Closet: Coaching While Still in Corporate

18:16 What Traditional Executive Coaching Gets Wrong

19:46 Still Anxious on the Scenic Route: Why the Work Was Not Done

21:09 Nervous System Regulation, IFS, and the Voice That Was Never Present Coco

25:12 What Self-Sabotage Actually Is (It Is Not What You Think)

26:13 The Good Girl Patterns That Keep High Achievers Stuck

30:41 Joy as Fuel: Argentine Tango, Buenos Aires, and Three Weeks of Dancing

37:18 The Science of Dancing as Nervous System Reset

39:15 Reading Books and Listening to Podcasts Is Not Enough

43:23 You Cannot Learn to Ride a Bike From a Podcast

44:27 Where to Find Coco and Wrap

FIND COCO
Website: cocoduancoaching.com

Coco on LinkedIn

Unchecking the Boxes (book): Available on Amazon

The Badass Leader Podcast: Apple Podcasts

FIND VICTORIA

On Instagram

On LinkedIn

victoria-steward.com