Dr. Brené Brown: The Can’t Miss Interview On Shame, Self Worth Empathy & Living a Courageous Life

In this episode we welcome legendary researcher Dr Brené Brown to the Science of Success. We discuss vulnerability and learn that vulnerability is not weakness, it’s not oversharing, it’s not soft. We learn that even brave and courageous people are scared all the time. We discuss the incredible power of learning to get back up when you’re down, how you can stop caring about what other people think about you, and much more in this in depth interview. Dr Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston where she holds the Huffington Foundation – Brené Brown Endowed Chair at The Graduate College of Social Work. She is the author of five #1 New York Times bestsellers: The Gifts of Imperfection, Daring Greatly, Rising Strong, Braving the Wilderness, and her latest book, Dare to Lead, which is the culmination of a seven-year study on courage and leadership. Brené’s TED talk – The Power of Vulnerability – is one of the top five most viewed TED talks in the world with over 35 million views. She is also the first researcher to have a filmed talk on Netflix, “The Call to Courage” which debuted in April 2019.Life is about the willingness to show up, to put yourself out there, to be all in, when you can’t control the outcome It’s not the critic who counts - it’s easy to spend your life in the cheap seats and hurl judgement at people who are trying and failing Our society doesn’t teach people how to get back up when the fall. Everyone spends their whole life tiptoeing around to ensure they never fall, but the more important skill is to build the skill of GETTING BACK UP. The importance of experiencing adversity. There’s a line between adversity and trauma, we need to experience. It’s not about being perfect at walking, it’s about LEARNING THE SKILL SET OF GETTING BACK UP AGAIN AND AGAINCourage is learnable, teachable, and measurable Courage is essentially the same thing as vulnerability. The Willingness to show up, put yourself out there, and be seen when you can’t control the outcome. Vulnerability, at its core, is about Uncertainty, Risk, and Emotional Exposure“There is no courage without vulnerability” Vulnerability is not as hard, scary, or dangerous as getting to the end of your life and asking “what if I would have shown up?"One of the most defining lessons of Brene’s seven-year study on leadership is the importance of courageous leadership. Even brave and courageous people are scared all the time. It’s not fear that gets in the way of us being brave or vulnerable, it’s armor. What is your go-to armor? How do you self protect when you feel emotionally at risk or exposed?How do you start to take off the armor? Loving kindness and self-compassion. When you work so hard to keep the peace on the outside, you wage a war internally. It’s not your job to make sure you don’t disappoint anyone.You can replace the armor with something that helps you - CURIOSITYGet curious about how you’re showing up, is it serving you? Are you self protecting in a way that’s keeping you small? Your brain thinks in stories - it builds and creates stories to explain the world around you - even if those stories are wrong.A lot of the time we create stories that don’t reflect reality in any way. Why you should start using “The story I'm telling myself…” or “The story I’m making up right now is…"Homework: Take the daring leader survey. Homework: Educate yourself. Watch her TED talk, her Netflix special, read her books. Creating a shared vocabulary is the root of change.

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