* DMP Olympic correspondent Dan Wetzel checks in, Gov. Whitmer's spending plan, J-Lo's struggles, Cologuard's instructional manual, Drew Crime, and we enroll in the Invisible College of Experimental Flatology.* There are some really sad and hungry Olympians in Beijing.* Dave Portnoy appeared on the MeidasTouch podcast and busted one of them during the interview. Portnoy also posted his lawsuit vs. Business Insider on Barstool.* We're tired of the Joe Rogan debacle. Something called Rumble has offered him $100,000,000 for a 4-year contract. Spotify is throwing money at unnamed charities to SHUT UP everyone complaining about Rogan* Trudi has a case of the Mondays. She partied hard with Marcus and Tom Labuda at the bowling alley.* Drew is really getting into Mötley Crüe. Tom Petty and Axl Rose sang together once and no one knew.* Our official Olympic correspondent, Dan Wetzel, joins us with coverage LIVE from Royal Oak, MI. The ratings suck. Zhu Yi disappoints two countries.* Jennifer Lopez still wants everyone to nail her. Life has been tough for JLo.* Trudi and Zooves may have a future custody battle of television sets.* COVID news: Hygiene theater is OVER. No more masks in New Jersey schools. BranDon prefers pantyhose over masks. Super spreader Mardi Gras is back.