Parents who engaged in gross negligence, failing to care for their children during sickness in infancy or adulthood, often continue to absent themselves when those children are sick as adults, sometimes driven by guilt, shame, or an ingrained pattern of avoidance.

Research suggests that this behavior is not necessarily a sudden realization of guilt, but often a continuation of neglectful or uninvolved parenting styles (also known as apathetic or detached parenting) where the parent prioritizes their own comfort over the child's needs. 

Parents who neglected their children may feel deep shame or guilt when faced with the consequences of their actions (i.e., their sick adult child), leading to avoidance as a way to manage their own emotional discomfort.

Neglectful parents often lack emotional involvement and empathy, treating children as a "burden" rather than a responsibility. If they failed to respond to the child's needs in the past, they are unlikely to develop that capacity later, especially during taxing events.

Neglectful parents frequently come from families where they were neglected themselves, often lacking the tools to provide care, or they may be emotionally "blind" to the needs of others.

These parents may "numb" themselves or use detachment as a survival mechanism, preferring to stay away rather than confront the reality of their child’s vulnerability, which may make them feel inadequate or unloving.

Neglectful, sometimes called "narcissistic" or self-absorbed, parents often prioritize their own needs and view caring for a sick adult child as a stressful, unwanted imposition.

Adults raised in these environments often learn to rely only on themselves and may struggle with the "resentful love" dynamic, where they crave care from their parent while simultaneously experiencing the pain of abandonment.

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