This is the final episode in this particular conversation with my anonymous guest. 

My palms are sweaty, I am holding back tears, and there is a tightening in my stomach. 

This has barely touched the surface of what I have attempted to share, along with my guest who also has walked a similar road of remaining in a marriage, submitting to her husband, and seeking godly counsel - only to end up realizing she and her children needed to do something different to break the cycle of abuse (even though it was not blatant physical abuse or adultery). 

I hope what we have shared is enough, for the time being. I hope it is enough to reach and speak to that woman (or man) out there who feels bound in a covenant relationship that is toxic. I want you to know, if your spouse is NOT willing, or able, to work alongside you to fix these broken habits, patterns, routines, and triggers - then you need to consider separation. 

Not necessarily divorce, but a physical separation, for a set time if you must, in order to break that cycle of abuse and toxicity. It will NOT be better for your children to "stay together" in the sense of under one roof. Perhaps, you could separate and keep "dating" - it does not have to turn into a nasty divorce. 

But, do not remain in bondage in a toxic marriage.  I no longer believe this is what God intended - and He knows, I really tried. 

I believe the church can do better in this area of support for our families, and hopefully, this podcast series will be one seed toward that outcome.

♥ Rachelle Suzanne

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Rachelle Suzanne • A podcast on Anchor | https://anchor.fm/rachelle-suzanne

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