46: F*ck Me Through The Phone

Or FaceTime me that p*ssy if its…cool

Sloots, it’s time to dust the cobwebs off your cooter-cats. Sofia is giving out some VITAL information this week. Sloot University has saved your life on multiple occasions, but this week it’s REALLY about to up your game. How many times has your man begged you (in that little bitch boy voice) on FaceTime to “just show me pleaseee!”  Luckily for you, Sofia will be teaching you ALL the ins and outs of FaceTime sex and how to pull it off in ways that even the top earner on OnlyFans would envy. Prop your phone up and spread your vagines, we’re putting on a show. Hope your FBI agent isn’t watching, unless you’re into that sort of thing. Next, Sofia breaks down the ONLY guide to men that you will ever need: The Rich-Hot Matrix. Derived from the infamous Crazy-Hot Matrix YouTube video that took the internet by storm years ago. Sofia breaks down her scientific scale telling you EXACTLY where the man of your dreams lies, based off of many many years of research of course. Finally, we found out that Tik Tok in it’s entirety is a snitch and is out to ruin your relationship. No, SERIOUSLY. A new feature has been discovered that will get you, or your shady boyfriend, in all SORTS of trouble if one of you slips up. Just another week in the office Sloots, just another week in the office. 

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