Cathy and Todd Adams, the husband and wife team behind Zen Parenting Radio, talk about showing up in partnership for our children, the gifts of growth and vulnerability, and how to foster deeper alignment with our parenting partners, even in the face of challenges.
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TPP 259: Getting Aligned Through Parenting and Marriage Challenges, with Zen Parenting's Cathy and Todd Adams

TiLT Parenting, from parenting activist, speaker, and author Debbie Reber, features transformational interviews and conversations with authors, parenting experts, educators, and other parents aimed at inspiring, informing, and supporting parents raising differently-wired kids (giftedness, ADHD, austim, 2e, learning differences, sensory processing issues, anxiety, and more). TiLT aims to help parents feel empowered and in choice in how they parent, have more peace in their daily lives, and parent and advocate for their child from a place of confidence and awareness so that our children can thrive in every way. https:/tiltparenting.com

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I’ve done one episode just about self-care for this show — it’s a solocast from five years ago where I shared twelve strategies and ideas for creating a sustainable, doable self-care practice. I’ll have a link to that in the show notes page for this episode.
Today’s episode is about self-care, too, but the focus is on self-care for autistic people, and joining me is return guest Dr. Megan Anna Neff of Neurodivergent Insights. Megan Anna has just published a brand new book called Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask! which she wrote to help autistic people accept themselves, destigmatize autism, find community, and take care of physical and mental health.
I really enjoyed going inside this book because, as we discuss, self-care is so much more than what it appears to be on the surface. Megan Anna considers self-care to be a collective effort that includes the well-being of the community, a framework that really resonated with me. So we talk about that, along with other ideas from Megan Anna’s book, including how internalized ableism can hinder self-care, considerations for navigating self-care for individuals with PDA, and insights into co-regulation, sensory considerations, and how advocacy and accommodations in the workplace can also be forms of self-care.
 
About Dr. Megan Anna Neff
Dr. Megan Anna Neff (she/they) is a neurodivergent Clinical Psychologist and founder of Neurodivergent Insights where she creates education and wellness resources for neurodivergent adults. Additionally, she is co-host of the Divergent Conversations podcast.
As a late-diagnosed AuDHDer (Autistic ADHD), Dr. Neff applies their lived experiences from a cross-neurotype marriage and parenting neurodivergent children to their professional focus. They are committed to broadening the mental health field's understanding of autism and ADHD beyond traditional stereotypes. This personal-professional blend enriches their work and advocacy within neurodiversity.
Dr. Neff is the author of Self-Care for Autistic People and a forthcoming book on Autistic Burnout. Additionally, she has published in several peer-reviewed journals on topics ranging from neurodivergence, place attachment, relational psychoanalysis, social psychology, and integration of spirituality into psychotherapy.
Passionate about distilling complex research into visually accessible formats, she translates research into visual pixels which you can find on her website, Instagram, and digital workbooks. Additionally, Dr. Neff is passionate about community building and creating digital communities by and for neurodivergent individuals.
 
Things you'll learn from this episode

Why self-care should be approached with self-attunement and an understanding of one's own needs

Why self-care is a collective effort that includes the well-being of the community

How internalized ableism can hinder self-care and why it’s important to address it

Ideas for navigating self-care for individuals with PDA regarding autonomy, co-regulation, and sensory considerations

Ways to practice self-care in the workplace, including self-disclosure, documentation, and setting realistic expectations

 
Resources mentioned for Self-Care for Autistic People

Dr. Megan Anna Neff’s website


Self-Care For Autistic People by Dr. Megan Anna Neff

* A special bonus offer for Tilt Parenting community *

Divergent Conversations Podcast

Neurodivergent Insights on Instagram

Neurodivergent Insights on Facebook

Dr. Megan Anna Neff on LinkedIn

Dr. Megan Anna Neff’s Link in Bio


Dr. Megan Anna Neff on Diagnoses and Misdiagnoses (Tilt Parenting Podcast)

Sarah Wayland


Is This Autism? A Guide for Clinicians and Everyone Else by Dr. Donna Henderson and Dr. Sarah Wayland


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TPP 372: Dr. Megan Anna Neff on Self-Care for Autistic People

Marriage and family therapist and author Jeremy Schneider ("Fatherhood in 40-Minute Snapshots") talks about what prevents some dads from being the father they want to be and explains how couples can strengthen their relationship.
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TPP 134a: How Fathers Can Be The Dad Their Differently Wired Child Needs, With Jeremy Schneider

Parent coach Zach Morris joins Debbie to answer a listener question about how to find the balance in supporting a young adult whose depression and anxiety is preventing him from taking steps toward his stated goals.
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TPP 371: Parent Lean-In: What Should I Do When My Young Adult Isn't Taking Steps to Reach His Goals?

Listen to an episode of Understood.org's podcast ADHD Aha!, a podcast about ADHD. Hear the unexpected and emotional ways ADHD symptoms surface for kids and adults, and the moments when it clicks that ADHD is real.
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You Might Also Like: ADHD Aha! from Understood.org

As many listeners know, Asher is doing a gap year this year, having graduated from high school last summer. And so I’ve been pretty immersed in this topic, but I’ve been getting so many questions from families who want to know more about navigating gap year. And in fact, I’ve been hearing more and more about the benefits of gap years for ALL students, not only neurodivergent kids, especially since the pandemic. The questions I get the most are what exactly is a gap year? How is a parent to know if their child would benefit from taking a gap year? How should a student be spending their time between high school and college, if that is indeed the next step for them? And where should I start when it comes to finding and vetting the best programs and possibilities for a child taking this year between high school and what comes next?
To explore this topic, I invited Dr. Eric Endlich, a clinical psychologist, founder of Top College Consultants, and expert who guides students with learning differences and mental health challenges through the college application process. I asked Eric how we can determine as parents whether our kid is ready or not for college, what types of gap year experiences for neurodivergent students exist, and how universities perceive a student taking a gap year when considering their application. We also talked about how to find the right program for your student and how to do some voting to make sure it’s the right fit.
As you’ll hear from the episode, Eric has a wealth of knowledge about ways to navigate the sometimes lengthy and unique runway for neurodivergent students. I hope you enjoy this conversation!

About Dr. Eric Endlich
Eric Endlich, Ph.D., clinical psychologist and founder of Top College Consultants, guides students with learning differences and mental health challenges through the college application process. Dr. Endlich has served on the Learning Differences/Neurodiversity and DEI Committees of the Independent Educational Consultants Association (IECA), and was honored by IECA with a “Making a Difference” award for contributions such as a database of neurodiversity-friendly colleges. He co-teaches a course, Working with Students with Learning Differences, and co-manages a 16,000-member Facebook group for parents of college-bound neurodivergent students. A national presenter, researcher and professional writer, Dr.Endlich has been interviewed by various media including Forbes, Money magazine, College Confidential and U.S. News & World Report.
 
Things you'll learn

The key components when considering a student’s college readiness, including academic capabilities and independence skills

What types of gap year experiences are possible (from formal programs to DIY)

How colleges perceive gap years, as well as whether to apply to universities before or during a gap year

A look at the types of formal gap year programs specifically designed to support neurodivergent students

Strategies and insights for researching and vetting gap year programs

 
Resources mentioned

Top College Consultants

Top College Consultants' Articles


Neurodiversity in College (Top College Consultants' Resource)

Top College Consultants on Facebook

Young Scholars Academy


The Dorm (therapeutic treatment center for young adults)


Parents of College Bound Students with Learning Disabilities, ADHD and ASD (Facebook group)

Dynamy Gap Year program


Mansfield Hall (post-graduate program in Connecticut)

Mitchell College

Landmark College Summer Program


Middlebridge School (post-graduate program in Rhode Island)

SOAR Gap Year program


Semester Off Program (Massachusetts)


Franklin Academy (post-graduate program in Connecticut)


Winston Transitions (non-residential post-graduate program in New York)


CIP Transition Program at Berkeley (California)

 
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TPP 259: Getting Aligned Through Parenting and Marriage Challenges, with Zen Parenting's Cathy and Todd Adams

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