Episode 241: ‘Homomentum‘ (Woody Shticks)

Are you an overeager trick or treater? Well, pull up a urinal, because this week professor Woody Shticks is here to teach you the Ancient Art of Cruising! If you’ve ever wondered how to master having unbridled sex in public places, Woody’s simple sexy procedures (up/down/flip-the-grip/stir/squeeze/repeat) and pro-tips like the tap back or the downhill doubledick will land you the Juiciest Johnson in no time. Are your knees sticky yet? #SubtletyIsForStraightPeople   About the Storyteller:   Woody Shticks is a comic stripper (comic, and stripper, usually at the same time) based in New Orleans. Follow on Instagram (mild), Twitter (spicy), or TikTok (ridiculous) @woodyshticks, or get into WoodyShticks.com!   Episode links:   Uberlube: Uberlube is a luxurious, high-grade silicone lubricant made from clean, body-friendly ingredients; it’s just silicone with a little Vitamin E. Uberlube is Dixie’s favorite lube, and they’re offering Bawdy Storytelling listeners a special offer – 10% off and free shipping when you use my code “Dixie” at UberLube.com. That’s 10% off and free shipping!   Check out this expert- led retreat at a private seaside ranch in Malibu: Looking to add more pleasure to your partnership and sex life? Craving a deeper connection with your partner but unsure where to start? We can help. Join sexologist Nicoletta Heidegger on September 24-25 for The Pleasure Connection, an educational retreat for couples. Their experts will guide you through developing core tools like effective communication, self-regulation, tips on reigniting the spark, and more. We're not taught how to have great sex and intimacy—but it's never too late to learn. More information at http:// thepleasureconnection.eventbrite.com   Bawdy Storytelling returns to live shows with Kinktacular on Sunday, September 25th! We’re celebrating Folsom Street Fair - that most high of Holy Days for Kinksters - with our big Folsom Kinktacular. We’re an Official Folsom Street Fair event, so join us after the Fair; we’ve got infamous perverts like Madison Young, Author Janet Hardy & more VIP tables for 2 or 4, Reserved and General Admission Seating, icy cold cocktails with dirty names and a seat for your butt after all that carousing in the sun at the Fair. Buy tickets for the live performance, or you can watch from anywhere on the Livestream: Tickets at https://bit.ly/BawdyKinktacular2022   Bawdy Storytelling’s ‘Feels like the First Time’ will be in Seattle on Saturday, October 15th and I’ve just confirmed 2 brand new storytellers for this show! Have you pitched me your story yet? It’s been almost 3 years since we did Bawdy in Seattle, and now we’ve got a new venue, new storytellers who are flying in cause they’ve heard the Seattle audience is incredible and we’re so excited about this joyful reunion with our Seattle community. Tell your friends about Bawdy’s return, and buy Tickets now at https://bit.ly/BawdySeattle2022   Wanna get Motorboated onstage at our next live Bawdy? Become an #ApplauseTiddies Sponsor! As a sponsor, you choose the bra, you’ll get a sneak peek at it onstage, and you’ll get Motorboated in it, plus you get to name my bewbs for that month (they are currently named RedBear and Michael, can you do better?). I have a Bra Registry at A Revelation in Fit in Oakland CA, so let’s do this thing, y’all! Contact [email protected] and let’s make a plan.   Patreon: If you love this podcast, you can thank Bawdy’s Patreon supporters - they made this happen! It’s because of people like you who support this important work that we do, people who want these stories wherever they are. Join our Patreon now and you get exclusive rewards when you join (like monthly free livestream tickets at the $10/mo level!) Become a member now at https://www.patreon.com/Bawdy   Want to support Bawdy in another way? Every bit helps, and it’s easy. Our links are:   Venmo: Venmo.com/BawdyStorytelling Paypal: paypal.me/bawdystorytelling Zelle: [email protected] CashApp: $DixieDeLaTour And THANK YOU!   Wanna work with Dixie? Do you want to learn to tell a compelling, relatable personal true story? I can help you dig deep, gain understanding and communicate with clarity. Whether it’s getting ontage, Writing a memoir, creating a podcast, or learning brand storytelling for your business, I can help. Email me at [email protected] and let’s make it happen.   Bawdy Got Me Laid perfume, Bawdy Butter & more: Dixie has created her own fragrance: You’ll love #BawdyGotMeLaid perfume, scented with golden honey, amber, ylang ylang, and warm vanilla. There’s also our (scented or unscented) creamy Bawdy Butter, Hair & Bawdy Oil, & more. Bawdy Got Me Laid Merchandise means you can deliver your own great smelling Motorboats while supporting Dixie and Bawdy. Get yours today at https://bawdystorytelling.com/merchandise   Check out our Bawdy Storytelling Fiends and Fans group on Facebook - it’s a place to discuss the podcast’s stories with the storytellers, share thoughts with your fellow listeners, & help Dixie make the podcast even better. Just answer 3 simple questions and you’re IN! https://www.facebook.com/groups/360169851578316/ ProTip: Subscribe to the Bawdy Storytelling email list & you’ll be notified of all upcoming storytelling workshops, livestreams, podcasts, live shows and Special Events first at https://bawdystorytelling.com/subscribe   Thank you to the Team that makes this podcast possible! Team Bawdy is:   Podcast Producer: Roman Den houdijker Sound Engineer: David Grosof Archivist / Video: Joe Moore Bawdy Livestream pre-show video by Donal Mooney Live-streaming by Rubeun Tan Storytelling support by Mosa Maxwell-Smith (!!!) & Bawdy Creator & Podcast Host Dixie De La Tour & Thank you to Pleasure Podcasts. Bawdy Storytelling is proud to be part of your sex-positive podcast collective!    Tags:   lonely packs apps viable options indirect too late for porn too early for breakfast night is shot dating crap benefits fun frisky finite bathroom guy drops wet hand dry mouth inflated cheeks open space blowjob call scotch hug boss platonic bummed emails pug walk wandering sticky knees great sex terrible luck shit spit on hit on threesome intimidating heartbreaking worthy anonymous basement running shoes cute cocky ready tongue hyper suck smirk spot wild door frozen ankles fear locked up head out closet case anonymity intimacy purgatory turn punch anger scream shock unleash winks excitement decorum walk gentle giant ourselves forget the rules kiss so hard hands time wasted clothes black pink sneakers weird sex naked toilet stranger my kisses stranger bathroom Yes repeat tapping cruise ahead find what’s above the shoes confused straight ancient art of getting it done scrappy chaps waxing poetic unbridled sex in public places I had crossed campus stall basement stall promised land stalls urinals door squeaks thank you negligent maintenance left white new balances new cool old sad favorite repeats initiates shuffle of cruising pause rules love rituals shockingly regimented gravitas environment grabbing ass procedure important homage divider formica mustache silent movie villain tucked belt buckle kneel under divider newbie precious hand nut two transfer student graduate program simple sexy procedure consistency seconds later pant door squeak game new spooked real bummer birdwatching   Want more Bawdy? www.BawdyStorytelling.com Follow us on Twitter: @Bawdy On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bawdystorytelling/ Like us at www.Facebook.com/BawdyStorytelling Join us on FetLife: https://fetlife.com/groups/46341 Support us on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/Bawdy Watch us on YouTube at http://bit.ly/BawdyTV Find out about upcoming Podcast episodes - & Livestreams - at www.BawdyStorytelling.com/subscribe