We and David Waldman have made it to the Wednesday KITM! Now, let’s try for Thursday!

Greg Dworkin bursts through the door, cinders in his hair, shirt torn, exclaiming “The State of the Union is not... sound” before collapsing. Really? I read that The Sims is 25, but are things that bad out there? Why yes, things are that bad. You won’t be reading that on government websites, because they have been shut off. As for the MSM, “Trump is brazenly defying laws” must be hard to type from the lower intestine of a leopard, which is also a bad location to recover from. But what if Trump defies judges next? Well, that is the point in being “brazen”, right? Anyhow, Trump’s face will eventually be leopard chow, because Elon’s actually running this operation, somehow one step ahead of everyone with his gang of kids, including Big Balls and The Artful Dodger.

The Dems charge over the hill, cavalry bugling, finally.  But who to rescue first? The FAA bans employees from making air travel safer. The USPS suspends and un-suspends packages from China. The Army doesn’t know what the F is going on. Trump hopes to have Gaza wrapped up to give Jared for Christmas. Don’t worry, Palestinians can come back after it’s “world class”, right after Paiutes return to Las Vegas and the Lenape to Manhattan. By then Gazans in the Middle East (and Africa!) will have collected enough condoms to line their new private swimming pools. And why does everyone keep trying to trade war Donald?

Oh, I forgot that Trump is an idiot figurehead, a complete cypher. Unfortunately, not enough people remember that. Remember that the enemy isn’t who Trump tells MAGA it is, it is whomever that Elon Musk thinks it is. At this moment the enemy is the less than a quarter of one percent of the US GDP in foreign aid. “Nonessential” USAID personnel will find out how essential they’ve been deemed late in the afternoon of the day that they need to leave their countries. The least essential guy available has been put in control of their future.