Hey, it’s the day after Labor Day, and you know what that means! For one, it means that it’s Tuesday, which means that not only is David Waldman back live, but so is Joan McCarter! Also, it’s the day that millions across the nation awake in the morning, craw out of their burrows, see their shadows, and realize the need to figure out who they will vote for. Kamala Harris and Tim Walz have already risen to the challenge, while Donald Trump and JD Vance extended their weekend.

By the way, Snopes states that no one has yet verified that the specimen jars carried by Trump supporters contained “fake” JD Vance semen… I guess they need local couch cushions for a match? That awkwardly segues us into Trump’s promise to make government socialistically provide IVF treatments for gay couples and single cat ladies. Good for him! Although Donald might not have considered how his stance might affect IUI families, and the sensibilities of his Vice President, or even his previous Vice President. Meanwhile, the Harris-Walz team heads to Florida with a clearer stance.

September also is the beginning of Congress’s legislative sprint, although there really wasn’t anything keeping them from starting earlier. House Gops now have only a few weeks left to impeach Joe Biden. 

If you had time set aside to head to Bedminster to attend the gala in honor of January 6th rioters, or have your photo taken giving a thumbs up standing on Donald Trump’s freshly dug grave, you will be disappointed as both events have been again postponed.

Public school teachers, already overworked and underpaid, are now expected to perform surprise sex change operations on their students.