This week, we’re turning to family dramas between mothers and daughters. Playing the role of both is our friend Queen Victoria! As a daughter, she had a rebellious relationship against her mother, the Duchess of Kent. Becoming Queen meant Victoria was able to shake off her mother’s smothering influence—and she did. As a mother, Victoria had enough children to have all kinds of maternal relationships—good, bad, and in between. For today, we’ll see this range in the relationship to her youngest daughter, Beatrice. 

The Duchess tried to prepare Victoria to be Queen. Unfortunately, this involved creating a large role for Sir John Conroy, a man Victoria hated. Conroy had been the Duke’s equerry and became the Duchess’s closest adviser. He could be charming when he wished, but he was also manipulative. He saw the chance to gain greater power by running the household and establishing for himself a significant role in Victoria’s reign. 

Denying her mother this power, Victoria ascended to the throne. When she became a mother herself, she healed the relationship with her own mother. The Duchess was a doting grandmother and support to the Queen.

Echoing the better relationship with her own mother, Queen Victoria attempted to manage the lives of her own children. This was true of her youngest daughter, Beatrice. The baby fo the family was Victoria's obvious favorite, which meant she was expected to spend her life taking care of her mother. The relationship came into crisis when Beatrice wanted a husband and family of her own.

Victoria had trouble making peace with Beatrice's decision, but eventually she did. When Beatrice became a widow after 11 years of marriage, she returned to her mother's side. After Victoria's death, Beatrice was the literary executor of the Queen's journals, editing and rewriting the history to create the image she wanted her mother to have. So as much as Victoria hoped to shape her daughter's life, her daughter shaped her mother's legacy.

History shows us what's possible.