Letters to my kids: A suicide survivor's lessons and advice for life

Episode 29 : Part 2 - Finding yourself, a tale not just for movies

08.09.2018 - By Letters to my kids: A 2-time suicide survivor and advocate for realistic optimism.Play

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Episode 29 : Part 2 - Finding yourself, a tale not just for movies

Music: “Just A Blip” by Andy G. CohenFrom the Free Music ArchiveReleased under a Creative Commons Attribution International License

https://allisonfallon.com/finding-yourself/

- Finding yourself is the process of discovering who you are and why you matter apart from outside achievements, relationships, and even in the face of great challenges or in life’s shifting environments. 

"The man who views the world at fifty the same as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life."- Muhammad Ali

- When you have a strong sense of self, you are able to adapt well to changes, to soothe yourself in times of sadness or discomfort, stay true to your convictions (even when there is outside pressure), avoid codependent or manipulative relationships, set boundaries with pushy people in your life, leave behind a constant need for approval, drop the guilt, receive criticism, act authentically, lead gracefully, and take responsibility for your life—no matter how it turns out.

"You cannot dream yourself into a character; you must hammer and forge yourself one."- James A. Froude

- One hard truth about developing a strong sense of self is that so much of this important development takes place in childhood. If you have faced some kind of trauma in your childhood, or if your parents didn’t help you establish a strong sense of self—you might still have a lot of work to do when it comes to finding yourself.

"Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves." ~Henry David Thoreau

- Know and own your story.

When we deny our stories, they define us. When we own our stories, we get to write a brave new ending —Brene Brown

-What has happened to me in the past does not define me. Do not try to walk this path alone. It’s too treacherous. If you aren’t comfortable finding a therapist, ask a few trusted friends or family members to walk with you.

"Know thyself?’ If I knew myself, I’d run away."- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

- I read all the time. I’m always trying to figure out more about myself, how I operate and why it matters. This has been a lifeline for me as I walk this journey of finding myself. Figuring out the driving motivations behind why you act the way you do not only helps you own your story, it also helps you interact and communicate in a positive way with others.

What seems like the worst thing that could possibly happen to you might turn out to be the very best thing. Because sometime it takes losing ourselves to find ourselves. And when we resist these lessons, we resist the very beauty and joy life is trying to offer us.

"Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes." - Carl Jung

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