Jana Spangler is an Integral Professional Life Coach with Symmetry Solutions who specializes in coaching individuals and couples who are experiencing shifts in their religious belief or are affected by a loved one’s shifting belief. Her work centers around understanding faith and spiritual development and offering tools to manage the challenges of relationship, identity, spiritual growth, and spiritual connection that emerge during times of shifting faith. She currently serves as a Relief Society Compassionate Service Coordinator in her ward. Jana attended The Living School—a wisdom school run by the Center for Action & Contemplation under the direction of Fr. Richard Rohr. During this two-year program, she studied Contemplative Christianity and other Wisdom Traditions and how they can support the transforming work of love in ourselves, our communities, and the world. Jana is a frequent speaker at conferences, workshops, firesides, retreats, and on podcasts, and has lectured as a guest at BYU on issues of faith and development. She lives in Holladay, Utah with her husband and three teenage children. In this episode, Jana talks with Kurt about how church leaders can have solidarity with those they lead, and the importance of having solidarity—not just service—in the church.

Highlights

7:15 Everyone needs to have their own faith journey

10:15 What is solidarity vs service?

11:00 We love to serve but hate to be served

12:30 When we are going through difficulties we don't want anyone to know

13:30 What is solidarity? The move of being one with another person

15:00 We do service more than we do solidarity

17:45 The hierarchy of our church is a blessing and a curse

19:00 The shame cycle with service and solidarity

21:00 Being aware of our ego needs and how it's getting in our way of journey

22:30 The bishop is not the only one who can facilitate solidarity

23:00 A barrier to solidarity is someone who shows that they have everything together

25:00 Vulnerability is not oversharing

26:30 Jana's faith struggle and how vulnerability helped her and others

29:30 Vulnerability can help solidarity

31:00 Sharing with family

32:00 Our worth is separate from worthiness

33:30 Jesus showed us how to descend into the abyss of the difficulty of humanity

34:00 Sometimes when things are new they are uncomfortable and that's ok

40:00 A key to solidarity is that we can all learn from others, even other faiths

40:30 Another pitfall is lack of mutual accountability

42:00 It's hard to feel that we are broken and those who are listening don't share their struggles with us

42:30 Give the people who are ministered-to a chance to serve their ministers

44:00 Lean more into empathy than sympathy

46:00 Getting in the hole and not fixing things for others but make others feel heard and understood

48:30 Solidarity makes others feel heard and understood

49:30 Don't judge people in their need

52:00 When you really get to know another person your esteem of them only goes up

53:30 Stop talking people out of their experiences

54:30 Imagine that people are really doing their very best

55:15 We don't want to be attached to weakness

55:30 Solidarity as it relates to sin: being one with those who are sinners

57:00 Withhold judgement of those who sin

58:15 If you have not been through something you have no standing to have an opinion on it: just listen to them

59:30 We do a lot of damage when we think we know better because it's working for us

59:45 How do we create solidarity?

1:01:00 Connecting people who have been through similar experiences