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Modern life is killing our marriages—not through dramatic blowups, but through the slow poison of chronic exhaustion. When was the last time you and your spouse truly connected beyond logistics and schedules? If you're functioning more like efficient roommates than passionate partners, you're experiencing what we call "marital exhaustion."

Satan's most effective strategy isn't tempting us to outright sin; it's keeping us so busy that we drift apart without even noticing. Between careers, children, social commitments, household responsibilities, and even church activities, couples find themselves physically present but emotionally distant. The Chinese language profoundly captures this reality—their word for "busy" combines characters meaning "heart" and "killing." Chronic busyness literally kills what matters most.

What makes this particularly dangerous is how we've twisted Jesus's second greatest commandment. Instead of "love your neighbor as yourself," we've adopted "love others at the expense of yourself." This distortion leads to self-neglect and burnout, leaving us with nothing meaningful to offer our partners. The truth? We cannot pour from an empty cup. Loving well requires being well—rested, renewed, and replenished.

Breaking free from marital exhaustion doesn't necessarily mean doing less (though sometimes it might). Rather, it means giving more—more love, more attention, more joy—from a place of abundance rather than emptiness. Like musicians who use metronomes to maintain proper rhythm, couples need to establish healthy rhythms that prioritize rest, connection, and spiritual renewal. During challenging seasons—whether facing health issues, caring for children or aging parents, or navigating career demands—healthy marriages operate not as 50/50 partnerships but as 100/100 commitments, with each spouse giving their absolute best given their current circumstances.

Ready to reclaim your marriage from the exhaustion epidemic? Start by honestly answering two questions: What genuinely brings you rest? And what revives your heart and renews your energy? Your answers will reveal the unique rhythm God designed for your relationship—a pace that gives life instead of draining it.

Reconnected - G&ES

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