TPP 307: Eliza Fricker Talks Parenting a Child with PDA

On today’s episode I’m talking to Eliza Fricker about PDA or pathological demand avoidance – and in fact I know many people interpret PDA as persistent desire for autonomy. I’ve done a few episodes on PDA before but never from a parent’s perspective so after reading Eliza’s book, The Family Experience of PDA, I knew I wanted to share her perspective with the Tilt community. During this episode, we talked about how demand avoidance is more extreme in a child with a PDA profile vs. the inflexibility and rigidity we might see in other neurodivergent kids, what Eliza has learned about herself parenting a child with PDA, and what her resistance was to the changes needed to her parenting style. Eliza also gave out some great tips for teachers who have a PDA student in their classroom and for parents who are struggling with family, friends, or people close to them who aren’t willing to understand what PDA is and what that means for their family.Eliza Fricker is the illustrator behind “Missing the Mark” a deeply personal and all too human exploration of a mother’s journey navigating the education system and everyday life with a child who can’t go to school. Eliza’s latest book, Can’t Not Won’t will be published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers in December 2022.Things you'll learn from this episode

What makes demand avoidance more extreme in children with PDA

Eliza’s experience in changing her parenting ways to become more flexible

Tweaks teachers can use to work with children who have PDA in a classroom setting

How PDA may look different than “typical demand avoidance” that we might see in some neurodivergent children

What Eliza has learned about herself from parenting a child with PDA

Advice for parents who are raising a child with PDA

Resources mentioned for PDA

Eliza Fricker’s website

The Family Experience of PDA by Eliza Fricker

An Intro to PDA brought to you by Harry Thompson and Laura Kerbey, illustrated by Eliza Fricker

Eliza Fricker / Missing the Mark on Facebook

Eliza Fricker / Missing the Mark on Twitter

Neurodivergent Education and Support Training (N-est)

Harry Thompson’s website

PDA of North America

Alfie Kohn on Practicing Unconditional Parenting (Tilt Parenting podcast)

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