Long ago in 2001, when Abacus first opened his magical school, many of his students begged to be sorted. But when Abacus conjures a Sorta Hat to do the job, his magic is as unreliable as ever…

Lessons include: labeling people is a recipe for cruelty; grownups and professionals have feelings, too.

This episode originally aired November 6th, 2017.

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Great merch available at the Imaginarium! Featuring artwork from Ana Stretcu:  whatifworld.threadless.com

Subscribe to What If World wherever you listen: link.chtbl.com/whatifworld. Kids can share questions with a grownup's help via Twitter @whatifworldpod, Facebook & Instagram @whatifworldpodcast, or email whatifworldpodcast@gmail.com

What If World is made by Eric and Karen O'Keeffe. A big thanks to Miss Lynn, helper in What If World and lover of doughnuts. Our podcast art is by Jason O’Keefe and our theme song is by Craig Martinson.

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Stella asks: What if the Sorting Hat started saying random words instead of houses?

What if a dragon lived in my closet? What if there were a never-ending bowl of ice cream? Pirates, fairies, wizards, robots, and friends help Mr. Eric tell stories inspired by kids’ questions. What If World’s progressive stories will keep kids laughing while fostering curiosity, imagination, and resilience. Listen Ad-Free: patreon.com/whatifworld 
Call in a What-If Question to 205-605-WHAT or email whatifworldpodcast@gmail.com!

Kids & Family

Fiction

Stories for Kids

Comedy Fiction

Meet the Dread Pirate Chlorine Clive and his crew of electron-stealing elements aboard their ship, The Grand Anion. They’re racing toward a king's ransom of gold and silver, but our detectives, Poppi and Ray, are determined to get there first. Can you learn enough about ions and ionic compounds to help?
What If World Podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ WHATIFWORLD and get on your way to being your best self.
The M.C. Detective Agency is a comic book series written by Colleen Kelley, Ph.D., as part of Kids Chemical Solutions. These comics help kids get an early introduction to chemistry and master material taught at the college level. The four-part comic book series, along with activity packets and sample lesson plans, are available at kidschemicalsolutions.com
Click here for their free Periodic Table with Ions! It’s also got some of Ray’s Rules to help you solve the case. You can also check out Chemistry Colleen on YouTube.
Subscribe to What If World wherever you listen: link.chtbl.com/whatifworld. 
What If World is made by Eric and Karen O'Keeffe. A big thanks to our producer Miss Lynn. Our podcast art is by Jason O’Keefe, and our theme song is by Craig Martinson.
Advertise on What If World: advertising@airwavemedia.com

M.C. Detective Agency - Chapter 7 - Follow the Red-Dotted Road

In an ode to Scooby Doo, one of Mr. Eric’s favorite shows as a kid, Alabaster Zero wakes up to find himself in the Freddy Booboo Bear Universe. It’s like your universe, except with more monsters and mustaches.
Lessons include: When things are too easy, you won’t enjoy yourself for long.
Join our Patreon for ad-free stories, monthly bonus episodes, a shout-out on the show, bi-annual mailings, and more! patreon.com/whatifworld
Subscribe to What If World wherever you listen: link.chtbl.com/whatifworld. Share questions & submissions with a grownup's help via email at whatifworldpodcast@gmail.com, voicemail at 205-605-WHAT (9428), Instagram @whatifworldpodcast, or snail mail:
What If World (or Mr. Eric)
P.O. Box 4905
Panorama City, CA 91412
Eric and Karen O'Keeffe make What If World. Our character art is by Ana Stretcu, and our episode art is by Lynn Hickernell. A big thanks to our producer Miss Lynn. Our podcast art is by Jason O’Keefe, and our theme song is by Craig Martinson.
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314. Elliot asks: What if everything had a mustache?

Henry takes a trip to What If World to help Alabaster Zero master his Rock and Roll skills as we celebrate ICAN radio’s 5th anniversary.
Lessons include: Practice makes progress; there’s nothing more Rock and Roll than being yourself!
Henry has a trailer up for his new audio drama for kids, Time Warp: The First Season. What If World has been on ICAN radio for five years and you can listen at: icanradio.org
Join our Patreon for ad-free stories, monthly bonus episodes, a shout-out on the show, bi-annual mailings, and more! patreon.com/whatifworld
Subscribe to What If World wherever you listen: link.chtbl.com/whatifworld. Share questions & submissions with a grownup's help via email at whatifworldpodcast@gmail.com, voicemail at 205-605-WHAT (9428), Instagram @whatifworldpodcast, or snail mail:
What If World (or Mr. Eric)
P.O. Box 4905
Panorama City, CA 91412
Eric and Karen O'Keeffe make What If World. Our character art is by Ana Stretcu, and our episode art is by Lynn Hickernell. A big thanks to our producer Miss Lynn. Our podcast art is by Jason O’Keefe, and our theme song is by Craig Martinson.
Advertise on What If World: advertising@airwavemedia.com

313. Henry asks: What if it rained electric guitars? (w/ Henry)

In our second April Fool’s special, the Whentbridge Timers go up against the Observatorium Grumblers in the biggest (and only-est) basketball game What If World’s ever seen. Pay attention, because the story might try to play some tricks on Mr. Eric.
Lessons include: Everyone loses sometimes, and it gives us a chance to improve; Winning doesn’t make you superior to others.
This remastered episode first aired on April 2, 2018.
Join our Patreon for ad-free stories, monthly bonus episodes, a shout-out on the show, bi-annual mailings, and more! patreon.com/whatifworld
Subscribe to What If World wherever you listen: link.chtbl.com/whatifworld. Share questions & submissions with a grownup's help via email at whatifworldpodcast@gmail.com, voicemail at 205-605-WHAT (9428), Instagram @whatifworldpodcast, or snail mail:
What If World (or Mr. Eric)
P.O. Box 4905
Panorama City, CA 91412
Eric and Karen O'Keeffe make What If World. Our character art is by Ana Stretcu, and our episode art is by Lynn Hickernell. A big thanks to our producer Miss Lynn. Our podcast art is by Jason O’Keefe, and our theme song is by Craig Martinson.
Advertise on What If World: advertising@airwavemedia.com

70. Rigley asks: What if phoenixes turned into tacos instead of ashes? (Remastered)

Poppi and Ray are headed to the Caribbean in 1707 for their most fantastical time-travel adventure yet. They’ll need your help learning about ions and ionic compounds as they prepare to face the dreaded pirate Chlorine Clive, a notorious electron thief! 
The M.C. Detective Agency is a comic book series written by Colleen Kelley, Ph.D., as part of Kids Chemical Solutions. These comics help kids get an early introduction to chemistry and master material taught at the college level. The four-part comic book series, along with activity packets and sample lesson plans, are available at kidschemicalsolutions.com
Click here for their free Periodic Table with Ions! It’s also got some of Ray’s Rules to help you solve the case. You can also check out Chemistry Colleen on YouTube.
Subscribe to What If World wherever you listen: link.chtbl.com/whatifworld. 
What If World is made by Eric and Karen O'Keeffe. A big thanks to our producer Miss Lynn. Our podcast art is by Jason O’Keefe, and our theme song is by Craig Martinson.
Advertise on What If World: advertising@airwavemedia.com

Stella asks: What if the Sorting Hat started saying random words instead of houses?

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