Stressful situations at work elicit conflict, but what would happen if you could learn to leverage conflict to your advantage? Sometimes even the slightest glance or cold shoulder can be perceived as an attack that drive wedges between colleagues. If a business is to thrive, however, conflict needs to be mitigated and pushed in a positive direction.

Stacie Speaker is a Hollywood communications specialist-turned-personal communications coach. She worked on numerous high-profile productions ranging from Jurassic Park to Friends before shifting to corporate communications where she helped to market and position children’s toys for companies like Mattel and DreamWorks. Today, Stacie's speciality is managing conflict in the workplace and identifying the thoughts and behaviors that lead to rising tension in and around the office.

In today's conversation, Stacie discusses the many positives of healthy conflict and how to address, defuse and find constructive feedback in clashes between coworkers.

THE FINER DETAILS OF THIS EPISODE:

(2:23) - Understanding how conflict gained its bad reputation

(3:18) - Debunking the myth that every conflict is a "problem"

(4:31) - The psychological roots of conflict and using disagreement to create growth and forward momentum in small companies

(7:43) - The different kinds of conflict and how to turn bad conflict into good

(10:08) - Identifying the different communication archetypes in your office

(12:54) - Addressing perceived conflict and getting a handle on tense work situations before they explode

(15:56) - Why workplace environments can bring out the worst in us

(18:27) - Learning to understand the different types of communicators and how we develop our individual communication styles

(21:35) - Identifying evidence of fear and the unexpected virtue of the movie What Women Want

(24:09) - Observations of men's argument styles and the art of crafting healthy conflict

(27:59) - Conflict reduction and management strategies optimized for women

(35:00) - Fostering healthy and constructive conflict in your workplace

(40:56) - Stacie explains her free gift, which you can find in the guest links section

(43:40) - Vince from Las Vegas asks if job boards have any merit

TWEETABLES:

“We avoid [conflict] so much that we just let it go instead of dealing with something that’s tiny and kind of a nuisance.”

“We put all of our attention on this word ‘conflict’ instead of peeling it apart and looking at it.”

“How can companies grow or societies grow without some kind of conflict to be able to move us forward?”

“As human beings, we’re addicted to being right... and when we get into that mode or that way of thinking, we’ve shut down all of our senses to be able to really connect with that person on the other side of the desk.”

“If all else fails, just ask!”

“The more aware you are to what’s going on the more aware you are of your own inner voice.”

“Observing is a blessing.”

“At the end of the day, let’s have some fun! [Work] doesn’t have to be so serious!”

“Having an intention will help you counteract the potential of the anger or the frustration or the fear that could be coming at you from somebody.”

“The more we can educate each other, I think we’re going to benefit as a whole, as a society, beyond anything we’ve known to this time and this date.”

“Let’s teach each other how to be in a conflict environment that actually works instead of detracts.”

Guest Links:

Stacie’s Communication Style Quiz: