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021: Mistaking Kindness for Weakness – how we talk to our kids about kindness while cautioning them about being taken advantage of
Do kind kids (and adults) get taken advantage of? Perhaps, but what we have found is that being -passive- is often confused with kindness and is FAR more likely to be taken advantage of.
Take-Aways from this episode:
1: Kindness can be taken advantage of, but passivity in one’s life will be taken advantage of.
2: Passivity is often confused with kindness
3: Passivity can show up in certain areas of life and not in others; it is not black or white clear cut.
4: If you say yes to everything because you are passive and not living without a purpose, it is not really an act of kindness (if your default mode is to say “yes” to every request because you either can’t or won’t say no, it isn’t kindness, because the option to refuse didn’t exist). Kindness has to be purposeful
5: The cure for passivity in any area of life is purpose.
6: Evaluate requests or acts of kindness through the filter of your purpose and act accordingly.
7: If you are being passive, kind acts you perform without alignment with your purpose will serve to breed resentment… resentment toward the person you helped, resentment toward yourself, and resentment toward the kind act itself.
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By The Best We Could: A Parenting Manual for Our KidsDo kind kids (and adults) get taken advantage of? Perhaps, but what we have found is that being -passive- is often confused with kindness and is FAR more likely to be taken advantage of.
Take-Aways from this episode:
1: Kindness can be taken advantage of, but passivity in one’s life will be taken advantage of.
2: Passivity is often confused with kindness
3: Passivity can show up in certain areas of life and not in others; it is not black or white clear cut.
4: If you say yes to everything because you are passive and not living without a purpose, it is not really an act of kindness (if your default mode is to say “yes” to every request because you either can’t or won’t say no, it isn’t kindness, because the option to refuse didn’t exist). Kindness has to be purposeful
5: The cure for passivity in any area of life is purpose.
6: Evaluate requests or acts of kindness through the filter of your purpose and act accordingly.
7: If you are being passive, kind acts you perform without alignment with your purpose will serve to breed resentment… resentment toward the person you helped, resentment toward yourself, and resentment toward the kind act itself.