Today is World Suicide Prevention Day. Hashtags are made, inspiring pictures are shared, and hope is strong. On this day, we come together as a society and recognize that suicide is a serious issue.

On a day that my efforts are especially recognized, I still know the suicide I’m trying hardest to prevent is my own.

Much like an alcoholic, I still identify myself as someone with a problem. I still admit I’m at risk for suicidal behavior. I haven’t attempted suicide in nearly a decade. I haven’t felt the urge to end my life in a few years. I’ve quickly addressed and pushed through my spurts of depression. Yet, I recognize that deep in my psyche, there’s a risk.

I’ve recently become anxious about this risk as I look towards the future. I hope to graduate from American University in May. People ask me, “What will you do when you graduate” or “do you have a job lined up?” Even worse, they tell me, “I know you’ll do great things.”

To finish, listen to the podcast or go to One2ManyProject.com/ep71