Healing at the Root

11. Trauma Isn’t Just Big Events- It’s the Absence of What You Needed


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When people think of trauma, they picture the big stuff: assault, car accidents, natural disasters.


But here’s the thing, trauma isn’t just about what happened to you, it’s also about what didn’t. The love you didn’t get. The validation you needed but never received. The protection that was missing when you were small.


In this episode, I share part of my own story: the “big T” trauma of childhood assault alongside the quieter but relentless drip of shame, bullying, and emotional invalidation.

Both left imprints on my nervous system. Both shaped how I learned to survive.


We’ll dive into:

  • Why trauma is about the absence of safety, not just dramatic events

  • How “small” wounds like shame or invalidation echo into adulthood

  • Ways these patterns show up as people-pleasing, perfectionism, and chronic anxiety

  • What healing actually looks like (spoiler: awkward, but worth it)

Your trauma doesn’t have to look like mine to be real. If your body remembers it, it matters.


👉 Ready to start healing those absences and rebuilding safety from the inside out? Join me inside Regulate & Release. Learn more here → ⁠HERE⁠.


Where to find us:

Instagram: @⁠dainwellness⁠

TikTok: @⁠dainwellness⁠

dainwellness.com 


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Healing at the RootBy DAIN Wellness