What exactly makes Kabam's Contest of Champions such a genius game for your iPhone (preferably plus), we don't know. But the sheer insanity that it is for free and the in-app purchases being clearly labelled 'for dorks' makes it a must – and us think, you're clearly a walkman-loving old dudem, who's stuck with a flip phone. Get Contest of Champions! Understand what everyone else is talking about!!!

Now, we also talk about some experiences we have had lately with online printing, which segues perfectly into a rant about ISIS, or the Islamic State. Who, it turns out, we hate quite a bit. Actually, we hate those motherfuckers a lot more than the child president originally responsible for displacing such a large crowd of violent pigs – too fucking bad.

I had a shit day as well. Just listen to the segement about online printing.