Two "finance geniuses" spend zero minutes on charts and a full segment on why you should die owing corporations six figures -- Keith's actual investment strategy, right after defending the $80 Olympic Club hat he bought to infiltrate rich hotel lobbies. Plus: getting sweated by dispensary security in Philly over Delta-9 loophole weed, ICP tokens vs. day-trading profits, Kanye's Montana ranch tax shelter, rent control as an asset class, and a surprise call-in from a Nashville country guitarist who invests exclusively in beer cans.