There is something beautiful and affirming about being truly seen and known. To be understood and accepted for who we are, despite our flaws and shortcomings, is a common aspiration in relationships, one which requires us to embrace vulnerability. Greggy Levoy, speaker and author of Vital Signs and Callings, suggests that the choice to show your cards and lower your defenses - despite the fear and anxiety of shame and losing control - is the kind of vulnerability that builds trust and safety in relationships. And when we embrace our vulnerabilities, we open ourselves to healing.

 

Today, Gregg and I contemplate the power of vulnerability. We discuss vulnerability’s capacity to create trust between relationships and encourage others to embrace their vulnerability. We explain how vulnerability feels like weakness when considered from the inside out but looks like courage when examined from the outside in. We describe how we can default to vulnerability through compassion and the difficulty of accepting love and appreciation. We also highlight the healing power of vulnerability and underscore how we can create space for someone when we are on vulnerability’s receiving end.

 

“Vulnerability and trust are intimately related. By lowering your drawbridge, you encourage your partner to do the same.” - Gregg Levoy

 

This week on Relationships! Let’s Talk About It:

• The relationship between vulnerability and trust
• How embracing vulnerability encourages others to be open with their own
• A communal way of expressing vulnerability
• Why accepting flaws and shortcomings is part of saying ‘yes’ to a relationship
• Understanding why people hesitate to be vulnerable
• How our childhood experiences with vulnerability persist into our adult relationships
• The importance of considering the recipient of your vulnerability
• Our tendency to equate vulnerability and love
• The sweet moment of being accepted with your vulnerability
• The healing power of revealing and vulnerability
• The role of confession in the therapeutic world
• What it means to have a confiding relationship
• How self-compassion creates strength in moments of vulnerability
• What we need to do when someone opens up about their vulnerabilities
• The human impulse of comforting other people

 

Resources Mentioned:

• A Natural History of Love by Diane Ackerman
• Love and Survival: 8 Pathways to Intimacy and health by Dean Ornish
• Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brene Brown

 

Related Content:

• Revealing Is Healing: The Power of Vulnerability by Gregg Levoy
• New Love...Taking Risks to be Real
• The Loss of Touch
• Non-Violent Communication
• Building Trust in Relationships
• Releasing Tension: The Courage to Feel
• Following Personal Passions and Taking Risks Can Nurture Your Relationships

 

Connect with Gregg Levoy:

• Gregg Levoy Website
• Gregg Levoy on Facebook
• BOOK: Callings: Finding and Following an Authentic Life by Gregg Levoy
• BOOK: Vital Signs: Discovering and Sustaining Your Passion for Life by Gregg Levoy

 

 

Let’s Talk About It!

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Theme music “These Streets” provided by Adi the Monk