Simple on Purpose | Intentional Living and Parenting

139. Are you TOO comfortable? And what is it costing you?


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I love comfort (#typeninevibes) and I know that a lot of my comfort-seeking is more the AVOIDANCE of discomfort.  I don't want to be uncomfortable. 
 
What things make you uncomfortable?
For me they have been things like: 
Taking my small kids out in public
Working on the conflicts in my marriage
Exercise
Getting up in the mornings
Doing dishes
Decluttering and organizing my home 
Seeing my kid struggle or be upset
Go to a social event I was nervous about
Sitting with all the stress and anxiety I felt about motherhood and life
Paying attention to how my body was feeling
No matter how simple these may seem, they were things I was avoiding because they were uncomfortable. 
But staying in what felt COMFORTABLE was coming at a cost. 
What does 'staying where we are' cost us? It has a cost to our relationships, to our health, to the state of our home. This complacency costs us something. 
When we realize what we have traded for comfort, it can make us feel shame. 
When my eyes were opened to what my comfort was costing me I felt like something was wrong with me. I needed to 'do better' and 'be better'. The first step was letting go of the shame I felt about this. Then I had to make a plan what I wanted to do about it. 
I decided I needed to TAKE ACTION. 
Then I realized there were myths I believed about being Someone Who Takes Action. Myths like: it is easy, it comes naturally, it feels good, it feels motivating. 
I realized that taking action felt very UNcomfortable
Listen in to this episode to hear:
Why do we seek comfort
The cost of seeking comfort
A mindset shift to help you take action
The purpose of discomfort
Building your tolerance for discomfort
Ways I made myself uncomfortable, on purpose
A CHALLENGE to join in this month
 
Links mentioned in this episode:
Making motherhood harder than it needs to be
Live your values worksheets
Live your vision worksheets
The Life on Purpose Workbook
Small things can change your whole life
The Simple on Purpose Facebook group  (make sure to answer the entry questions)
Tag me on Instagram    Use the hashtag #uncomfortableonpurpose
 
SIMPLE PLEASURE OF THE WEEK
Is FIKA - the Swedish tradition of taking a coffee break, emphasis on the break part. At the heart of it is a slowing down and truly breaking. FIKA often includes coffee, a sweet treat, and a good conversation. But it can also be done solo as well. 
I love to FIKA at my home with coffee, a treat, and staring out the window at trees. 
We live in a culture of BUSY and it can be a badge of honour to never stop and rest. But we know that we do BETTER WORK when we are rested. 
Even as a mom you can FIKA. Over the years I have told my kids 'mom is on a coffee break' and I sit down to pause and slow down for a minute. 
 
Full episode transript
(unedited)
Hey friends, it's Shawna, your nerdy girlfriend and life coach from sublime purpose.ca. place for you if you feel like clutter, motherhood, relationships, life, like it seems so overwhelming. And if you are finding that you go about your day to day with some kind of resentment or frustration, this is a sign you've been living on autopilot, just letting life happen at you, instead of living it on purpose with your own purpose.
So thank you for being here. I am a certified coach practitioner, transformational life coach, and I use the enneagram faith if you want that included, and the cognitive behavioral therapy model as tools that I bring into my life coaching approach. I teach moms all around the world, the tools they need to set out the life they want their life on purpose. And that means knowing your vision, where do you want to go? What you want to be building, and knowing your values, what matters a long way. And whether you're doing this with me through coaching through the life on purpose workbook listening to these podcasts. I'm so happy you're here.
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