A dear friend, Kenny, used to relate an anecdote for which the punchline was a child referring to him as the, “Speech Terrorist.” I love that. Sometimes, though, it really is like that’s what we do. I think about the amount of children and young adults out there whose entire lives are utterly therapized. For some, almost every waking minute is programmed, structured, or dictated; almost every behavior is measured, studied, and pathologized; and every ounce of fun is wrung out of life for the sake of fitting in and “looking like a typically developing child.” I say fuck that. And ultimately, all of the children I’ve met in these scenarios have essentially said the same.

I see so many professionals restraining children and telegraphing at them, “Use…your…words!” I’ve often thought, what if the child looked up and said, “Fuck you!”? Behaviorally, you’d have to positively reinforce that…because the child did exactly what s/he was told. Right? (What we generally mean is, “Use the words I want you to use. And do the things I want you to do. And be interested in my shit. And follow my agenda.” We should say what we mean, lest we get a ripe F-bomb legitimately lobbed at us.)

Do you remember the show, “Life Goes On,” with Chis Burke as Corky Thatcher? He was the first television star that I can remember with Down syndrome…or any kind of uniqueness, for that matter. There was an episode in which he just became sick of it all and he raged against the machine (…fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me). For the talent show, he dressed in all leather with sunglasses and he lip-synced Public Enemy’s, “Fight the Power.” I loved the episode and the scene then, and it remains relevant to this very day. Watch it. Please. (Thank you.)

But I digress…

On today’s episode of the D2D podcast, Eric from the Grind (…any of you forty-somethings out there remember him?!…) makes an appearance as Blackbox sings “Everybody, Everybody” in the background. (Awwwwww yeahhhhhh. It’s Eric from the Griiiiiiind! Here at MTV Spring Break beach house. Nineteen ninety four, baby!!) Jen and Greg discuss fat basset hounds and asshole Springer Spaniels, canine ass-balls and neck-vaginas (“They call…that thing…neck-gina.”), and a titillating, immaculately alliterative, Huffington Post title, “Invading the Vagina in Virginia.”

Additionally, and on a more serious note, Greg asks the question, “Why Speech and Language Pathology?”

We present to you, “Speech Terrorist.”

(Listen closely for a George Clinton Funkadelic incursion at 4:45. Not sure what happened, but everybody’s got a little light, under the sun!)