This episode is part 1 of 2 in my series on punishment.

In this episode, I talk about the practical and spiritual reasons for why we don't need to use punishment in our parenting.

If our goal as parents is to teach our children, then it's time for us to start thinking deeply about the lessons that punishment is really teaching. Does it really teach kids self-discipline and morality? Or does it teach them that...

• Making another human suffer is the best way to respond to their mistakes
• Kids can't be trusted to do the right thing unless there's a threat or a bribe involved
• As long as I don't get caught making a mistake, I'm safe

Not only does punishment do the opposite of what we hope it will, it is also the opposite of repentance and the opposite of what Jesus Christ teaches.

Jesus says that He came not to condemn the world, but to save it. He says that He suffered so that we don't have to suffer if we repent. He says do good to those that hate you, persecute you, or do evil to you. For some reason, we can apply this counsel to strangers, but when it comes to our kids, we default to "an eye for an eye."

It's time to rise above the world's way of doing things and have faith in Christ's way.

In next week's episode, I'll answer the burning question you'll be left with at the end of this one: If we aren't going to use punishment to teach, what tools can we use instead?

Resources Mentioned:

Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn

Tom Piccirilli: @thedadvibes on Instagram

Scripture References:

Scriptures about "false traditions": Mark 7:7–9; Matthew 15:3; Alma 60:32; Doctrine & Covenants 93:39

Doctrine & Covenants 19:16

John 3:16–17

Alma 34:32–35 (don't procrastinate repentance)

Luke 6:27–38 (the Sermon on the Mount)

Romans 12:17–19

Matthew 6:1

John 17:3

Mosiah 2:38

Doctrine & Covenants 11:9

Romans 2:4