Overthink

154. Living With Men with Manon Garcia (extended)


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Content warning: this episode extensively discusses rape, sexual violence, and incest.

In episode 154 of Overthink, Ellie and David talk to philosopher Manon Garcia about her book,  Living with Men: Reflections on the Pelicot Trial. They discuss the rape case of Gisèle Pelicot and how the subsequent trial of her husband and fifty additional men sheds light on the normalization and acceptance of sexual violence in what is known as ‘rape culture.’ In what ways is the current understanding of consent as ‘permission giving’ harmful?  How is heterosexual love often tied to objectification? Why does the ‘boys will be boys’ mentality make it difficult for us to rely on the criminal justice system? And how do we live with men knowing that cases such as these are incredibly common? In the Substack bonus segment, your hosts discuss the politics of language and the risk of eroticization in recounting stories of sexual violence, and they think through where we should go from here in terms of sexual and romantic attachments to men.

Works Discussed:

Manon Garcia,  Living with Men: Reflections on the Pelicot TrialSimone de Beauvoir and Gisèle Halimi, Djamila Boupacha

Highlight: Contradiction of Strength versus Weakness

* In the Pelicot trial, the defendants were characterized as both strong and weak in their defense

* On the one hand, their desire to dominate a woman was portrayed as stereotypically masculine

* On the other hand, a lot of the defense relied on their weakness, such as lack of intelligence, education, or maturity

* Manon Garcia makes a comparison that the men are both like stallions and animals that cannot control themselves

* Garcia also points out that “for them, the sexy they have with their wife, it’s fungible with raping an unconscious old lady” and questions how the defendants could even get aroused

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