Appropriateness, values, and activism in weddings. Katrina Majkut, author of the book, The Adventures and Discoveries of a Feminist Bride; What No One Tells You Before You Say ‘I Do’, joins us this week. Katrina’s book is the only wedding book that explains where all our Western traditions come from and how they impact the people we love. It uses feminism, humor, and fun facts to help eradicate all the hidden sexism in wedding traditions and provides egalitarian options for all. Katrina is also a visual artist, who uses embroidery to reveal how other feminine traditions have affected women's lives, and exhibits around the US and lectures at colleges about activism, textile art and women's issues.

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Big Takeaways

Weddings can be nerve-racking when you are joining together with family that comes from different political/religious views. Everyone in the world is bubbled to the top, and on edge.

A couple must be conscious of the location of their wedding, especially if they are inviting a diverse group of people who may be affected by the venue. For instance, Christy’s brother, who is a gay man, was invited to a wedding in Jamaica where people are still openly prosecuted for being queer. He decided to not attend as it wouldn’t feel safe.

A wedding isn’t just about your day, it’s also about being a good host! Revisit the options, make a list of priorities, and figure out what are the most important factors for you and your guests.

As a guest, what is the most effective way to show your beliefs? Is it protesting outright, or is it showing up and making sure you are seen? Ultimately, though. only attend if you feel safe in that space.

If you choose to politicize your wedding, it doesn’t have to be huge and over the top. There are ways to do it in small, meaningful ways. You can change the outdated language to be more reflective of the current times. Removing man and wife, or kiss the bride, etc will be impactful. Modernize your wedding, get rid of the outdated traditions. You can ask for charitable donations instead of a gift, or replace the wedding favor with a donation.

Remember that good change will trickle down, but understand that you are not going to save the world on your wedding day. Just be conscious and deliberate with your choices that speak to your passions. These choices can be so impactful. Small ripples make big changes down the road.

Some states make it harder for men to change their name, so if you are in one of those states, contact your local ACLU. Mx. is the new gender neutral new prefix. When in doubt, and you know they identify as female, use Ms., it is equivalent to Mr. in respect.

Links we referenced

www.aclu.org

www.hitchswitch.com Promo Code: BIGWEDDING

Google: MAGA Wedding

https://www.insideedition.com/vegan-bride-reportedly-bans-meat-eating-guests-her-wedding-50878 - Vegan Bride story

https://offbeatbride.com/wedding-as-political-act/

Instagram: @TheFeministBride

www.thefeministbride.com

Buy the book! https://www.etsy.com/listing/593663616/signed-book-the-adventures-and?ref=shop_home_feat_1

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The Big Wedding Planning Podcast is…

Hosted and produced by Michelle Martinez 

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