True Love Knots

159 From Heartbreak to Healing: Navigating the Modern Dating World with Bev Mitelman

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Are you struggling to find lasting love in today's dating world? In this episode of the True Love Knots Podcast, Maria is joined by relationship expert Bev Mitelman, who explores how attachment styles, shaped by early childhood experiences, impact our ability to form deep connections. She shares her journey of dating after a long-term marriage and explains how patterns like secure, anxious, and avoidant attachment influence relationships. By unlearning unhealthy behaviors and recognizing emotional availability in partners, Bev offers practical insights to heal past wounds and build fulfilling connections. Ready to take control of your attachment style and find lasting love? Dive in for transformative advice.

 

Standout Quotes:

  • “Developing skill sets for dating and love relationships also spills into your professional life.
    • People don't realize that how you interact with yourself and others personally and professionally makes all the difference.”
  • “I'm a strong proponent of doing personal work and understanding yourself to be the right partner for someone else. If you're emotionally dysregulated, you can't be a good partner to anyone.”
  • “Picking a partner, regardless of your stage of life, is critically important to your mental health and well-being. This person could bring you tremendous joy, pleasure, and peace, or they could get you a lot of drama, chaos, and pain.
    • So choose wisely.”
  • “If you spot anything that seems off, it's okay to take caution and ask about it. We all go through struggles, but if someone isn't taking any steps to do the work, I would raise a red flag.”
  • "Love isn't blind; love is learned. We learn in childhood how to give and receive love, which
    • forms distinct patterns in our minds that follow us into adulthood."

    Key Takeaways:

    • Identify your attachment style and understand how it shapes your relationships - both personal and professional. Explore resources to learn more about attachment theory.
    • Take the time to reflect on your needs and non-negotiables in a partner before jumping into a new
      • relationship. Clarity on what you value most can help you make wiser choices.
    • Be cautious of getting involved with someone who is still emotionally entangled with an ex-partner, whether through ongoing legal battles, shared living situations, or unresolved feelings. Allow time for proper healing.
    • Pay attention to red flags like emotional dysregulation, mental health struggles, and lack of personal growth work. These can indicate an unhealthy dynamic that may be difficult to sustain.
    • Embrace the mindset that "love isn't blind, love is learned." Commit to the personal work required to unlearn unhealthy patterns and relearn healthier ways of giving and receiving love.

      •  

      Episode Timeline:

      [00:03] Introducing

      Bev Mitelman

      [02:02]

      Bev’s Journey from Personal Growth to Relationship Coach

      [04:33]

      Understanding Secure and Insecure Attachment Styles

      [08:26]

      How Attachment Styles Shape Relationships and Boundaries

      [08:44]

      Bev’s Dating Experience After Long-Term Marriage

      [12:51]

      Navigating the Complexities of Modern Dating

      [19:14]

      Spotting Red Flags and Building Stronger Relationships

      [22:33]

      Closing Thoughts and Future Topics

       

      Learn

      more about Bev Mitelman on her socials:

      Website:

      https://securelyloved.com/

      LinkedIn:

      https://www.linkedin.com/in/bevmitelman/

       

      Learn more about Maria Romano and True Love Knots at:

      Website: https://trueloveknots.com

      Email: [email protected]

      Phone: +1 702-501-4150

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      True Love KnotsBy Maria Romano