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#164 – Breaking the rules when you’ve been raised a rule-follower
As introverted, sensitive women who spent most of our lives oblivious to our neurodivergence, as did everyone around us, we find it SO hard to believe or feel that we have permission, that it’s okay, that we’re allowed to do, say, be, ask for, or take what we want or need.
After decades of taking on board the message that we need to live by others’ rules and expectations, that someone ‘better’ than us needs to signal their approval, we find it incredibly difficult to give ourselves permission.
To allow ourselves to state what we need or want, what we like or don’t like.
To show our enthusiasm and excitement.
To take time for solitude and rest.
To permit ourselves to move on from what no longer interests us.
To say no when we want or need.
To be ourselves.
The result of defaulting to others for approval and permission means a lack of trust in ourselves as well as a cocktail of exhaustion, resentment and overwhelm.
Learning that you can give yourself permission, that your own approval is the most important of all, is a tricky process but incredibly worthwhile. Because without it how can we hope to find the peace, ease and joy in our daily lives that we crave?
In this episode I share five ways I give myself permission to do things in ways that work for me, even if it means not following society’s rules…
If what I share in this podcast resonates with you and you’re looking for support go to gabrielletreanor.com. And if you’d like to share this or any of my podcast episodes on social media or with your friends or family that would help more quiet ADHDers to know they’re not alone too.
Resources:
* If what I’m sharing resonates with you I’d love to hear from you, email me [email protected].
* Read my posts about the experience of a midlife, late-discovered ADHD woman here.
* Find out more about the Quiet ADHD Club and join here.
* You can find more info including my coaching services on my website here.
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit gabrielletreanor.substack.com
View all episodes
By Gabrielle Treanor
4.7
2828 ratings
As introverted, sensitive women who spent most of our lives oblivious to our neurodivergence, as did everyone around us, we find it SO hard to believe or feel that we have permission, that it’s okay, that we’re allowed to do, say, be, ask for, or take what we want or need.
After decades of taking on board the message that we need to live by others’ rules and expectations, that someone ‘better’ than us needs to signal their approval, we find it incredibly difficult to give ourselves permission.
To allow ourselves to state what we need or want, what we like or don’t like.
To show our enthusiasm and excitement.
To take time for solitude and rest.
To permit ourselves to move on from what no longer interests us.
To say no when we want or need.
To be ourselves.
The result of defaulting to others for approval and permission means a lack of trust in ourselves as well as a cocktail of exhaustion, resentment and overwhelm.
Learning that you can give yourself permission, that your own approval is the most important of all, is a tricky process but incredibly worthwhile. Because without it how can we hope to find the peace, ease and joy in our daily lives that we crave?
In this episode I share five ways I give myself permission to do things in ways that work for me, even if it means not following society’s rules…
If what I share in this podcast resonates with you and you’re looking for support go to gabrielletreanor.com. And if you’d like to share this or any of my podcast episodes on social media or with your friends or family that would help more quiet ADHDers to know they’re not alone too.
Resources:
* If what I’m sharing resonates with you I’d love to hear from you, email me [email protected].
* Read my posts about the experience of a midlife, late-discovered ADHD woman here.
* Find out more about the Quiet ADHD Club and join here.
* You can find more info including my coaching services on my website here.
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit gabrielletreanor.substack.com