I hope everyone is super excited as we count down to 2020!

We're going to talk about why New Year's Resolutions flop. I don't know about you, but for me, I don't make New Year's Resolutions anymore because they became a self fulfilling prophecy of alway failing my resolutions and then no matter what I did next, I would just fail, and fail, and fail. I would fall of the wagon, and that leads to feeling bad about yourself over and over.

I do have goals and a lot of things I work on, but it is spread out year around instead of thinking of it as a closeout and start of a new year.

I'll share the top 10 reasons I feel New Year's Resolutions flop, and what we can all learn together.

1. A resolution is an intention. An intention is wonderful, and there are so many things we can glean from an intention like I will eat better; I will exercise more; I will visit with my parents more . . .whatever that intention is. It's not magic though. A lot of times people think "I announced my intention, now where I my results?" I don't see my results! Then people move further and further away from the result, and think "I don't understand why!" Think about it this way, if you want to buy a new car or house, or move somewhere new like Disney Land, does it magically show up in your life, or do you need to take steps to make it happen? It's the same way with any other resolution in life. You have to state the intention and then also the action steps. I think sometimes people don't set up the action steps, or they aren't sure what they are.
2. Too general. If we go back to wanting to eat better, or get more sleep, or workout more, it is a very general, vague, wonderful idea to support a new lifestyle. You now need to break it down and ask what it looks like. For example, what does eating better mean? For me, that would be more variety in my diet. I might set the goal of buying 3 different vegetables that I didn't buy on my last trip to the grocery store, so there is a difference between a specific action versus a whole idea. I'd encourage you to try specific actions that fit into your daily lifestyle instead of trying to tackle the whole global idea at one time.
3. Setting goals that aren't realistic for our circumstances. As an example, I am a fitness competitor. I wanted to start gymnastics as an adult. Wouldn't it be cool if I could do a kip, or a roundoff backhandspring on stage? Then I got into it and loved it; it was so much fun. I quickly realized though, that there would be a lot of limitation to achieving this goal. I had to look at it individually. First, do I have the shoulder and back flexibility, and at my age can I develop that? Then I had to consider that I perform on a cement stage, not a sprung floor, so I'd have to be very confident and have a lot of power I didn't have. I could probably achieve that if I really, really work for it. How many hours and repetitions would that take? If I break that down over the hours I can dedicate to training, how many years would it take for me to achieve the goal? It actually wouldn't be realistic. I can have fun being upside-down on a trampoline, but it's not realistic for my stage routine. The same goes for weight loss, and other fitness/wellness goals too. We have to ask, "what's realistic with my lifestyle, and my genetics, and my resources, and what is surrounding me in life?" We need to assess if your goal is realistic for you.
4. We feel like we need to be autonomous. We are used to doing it all—going to work; caring for our families, and making everything happen. We feel like we need to do it on our own. We forget to assess what we need with new lifestyle changes and behaviors. What do we need? Accountability? Knowledge? Motivation? Equipment or Finances? to get from where we are today to that next step. If we can assess those gaps and needs, then we can build the support team, coaches, and structure to get what we need to make a reality out of daily tasks. For example, if I want to learn gymnastics, I need a coach, access to equipment, and access to it when I'm not at work. I'm putting in a lot of constraints. Now I need to look at if I can access these resources within the constraints now, or if a different time is better, or if it actually makes sense within my life demands? Can I have access to build the team and time to dedicate to what I want to achieve?
5. Giving up too quickly. For example, I had wonderful intentions for a few years. I made vision boards every year with every major important area of life like health, fitness, workouts, nutrition, spirituality, work goals, everything . . . .There were great big glowing titles and sticky notes of supporting actions. I was like "yeah, I'm going to do this!" I had specific actions and outcomes; I was super motivated, and I finally folded up the board and put it away. I was never achieving it, and I was always failing. One year, I was house cleaning and found one of the boards from five years prior. I was ready to disassemble it and repurpose it for something else. I took a moment to read it. I was like "wow! I actually did achieve these things." I paid off my student loans. I started going to church, and doing a million other things. "Wow, I did all of these things." I achieved everything on the board. When I set up the board, I thought I was going to do it in a year. It actually took me 5 years to do what I thought I was going to do it in a year. I'd encourage you not to give up on yourself, and realize that things are going to take at least twice as long as you think it is going to.
6. Setting too many goals. This diffuses your attention, then you don't achieve goals in the time you thought you were going to. For example, I was walking at work and I was between two rooms trying to walk two directions at once. I was literally frozen in space because I was trying to go two completely different things at one time in two completely different rooms. It's the same thing with goals. If we try to go two directions at one time, or try two goals that are maybe not compatible at one time, we're going to be disappointed.
7. Perfectionist tendencies. You don't have to be 100% all the time. Plan for wiggle room, and then enjoy your wiggle room. Foe example, a lot of people ask me about my off season nutrition as a fitness competitor. I'm 80% good all the time. I have ice cream, chocolate, and treats every week. I enjoy them. Many people, when they aren't 100% feel like they need to punish themselves and wait until Monday to start again. Instead, plan to be 80% good and enjoy the rest of the 20% Have days where you have treats and don't workout, but 80% of the time be there and be committed.
8. Accepting change. Let's think back to when you were a kid. Someone probably asked you what you want to be when you grow up. For me, I wanted to be an astronaut. My family didn't shatter my dreams by explaining the reality to me, but they put me in different situations so I would come to discover that reality. I went to a NASA talk. I went and toured Air Force planes. I realized that I hate flying. You need a lot of flying hours to be an astronaut. I didn't want to fly, and I didn't want to joint the Air Force to get enough flying hours and training to work toward being an astronaut. Uh oh. I don't want to fly; I don't want to be in the Air Force, so how can I be an astronaut? I realized that the daily actions and commitments needed in my life to achieve that goal of being an astronaut wasn't going to happen. I think sometimes we maybe don't have grand goals like that, but we have goals like losing 30 lbs. That's not my goal, but its one I hear often going into the New Year. We need to say "I'm going to try to make these changes, but as I go I'm going to find things that don't feel right or work with my lifestyle." For example, maybe I was going to give up caffeine, and I discovered that it just isn't working in my lifestyle. Before you throw your change out the window, ask yourself if there is just a part of the change that you can keep. Maybe there's something in the environment? Maybe my change doesn't work in this environment, but it would work in a different one. For example, I jointed a Crossfit box. I want to lift; I want to put on muscle; there's so many things I like about this. It turned out to be the wrong box for me. The members of that box were very different in what they preferred to do everyday in terms of workouts and hanging out. It wasn't that I shouldn't do Crossfit; that particular environment wasn't right for me. I needed to look outside that and say, "weightlifting is right for me; Olympic lifting is right for me; hanging out with other people in fitness and supporting them is right for me." I'm going to take those elements and move on with them to try a different environment. I encourage you, before you give up on a goal, ask yourself "what about this is working? What about this isn't?" Fractionate it and continue with the fractions to redefine the goal.
9. Environment. We often set goals without considering the dynamic environments around us. First, we have family and friends. If we have certain events with them like happy hour, our friends are going to continue with their lifestyles, but it might be different for you with a new health, lifestyle, or fitness goal. You might have to say no, or say "this is what I'm working on; it's not consistent with my goal, but I would love to join you for happy hour, and I'm going to have water." Be OK with that; don't explain it. Be consistent to yourself; be accountable to yourself. If your'e thinking about workouts, consider the environment. In Minneapolis, we're having an ice storm. I'm not going to the gym. What am I going to do instead? I already have things in place knowing we have this weather. I'm not going to drive, go to the gym, or sit on my butt. Instead, I have my weights, pull up bar, and snow day workout. I'm going to go downstairs and do it.

I hope that these reasons whey people flop New Year's Resolutions, myself included, help you think about if New Year's Resolutions are right for you, and how you can incorporate some of these factors. I'd love to hear from you! I believe health and wellness can be for everyone who wants it in some way. Please reach out with your questions, thoughts, and tips to help others too!

Happy New Year!