Richard call at 8:15 am singing:

 

 

It’s off to work we go

It’s morning, don’t you know

We’ve got to go to work

Till we find another jerk...

 

He was in a happy mood and driving out to an eviction.  I love his attitude.  I drove to his condo that evening and he put a card on the windshield of my truck and told me I couldn’t read it until the following morning. He’s a great listener and is so open and honest with his own thoughts.  I cherish his honesty.  As he drove off to work the next morning I read the card that said, “With Loving Thoughts.  The times we’ve shared, the way you’ve cared, The loving things you do… All these are reasons why there’s love In every thought of you.”

 

When I came over last night, I brought him vitamin packets for the home and office because he had said that he wasn’t taking the vitamins as regularly as when he was dating the doctor.  This isn’t as well formulated for him, but I reasoned that taking some vitamins is better than not taking better vitamins.  When he bought the card, he didn’t know that I had bought the vitamins for him.  I haven’t even begun to show him how loving I can be and he sent this card thanking me?  I wanted to chase him down, pull him over in traffic and tell him I love him too.  I started fast out of the parking lot, but remembering that I had already made him late for work, figured I would wait until I saw him in person tonight.  I didn’t want to tell him by phone and I didn’t want to burst into his office and embarrass him in front of his staff.  I would wait until tonight and try to make it as memorable for him as for he had made his first admission of love to me.

 

He called me later in the day and said that he was going out with his friend, the doctor.  He asked how I felt about him doing that.  I couldn’t verbalize it well and faxed over the first nine pages of this journal.  He said she had called him wanting to rekindle the fire that had been smoldering for the last three weeks.  I have been telling him that I can make no claims on him due to my own marital status and that I want him to “play the field” so that when I can commit, he will know that he has made the best choice in me.

 

I want a monogamous relationship and I am willing to forego it now to insure it later.  There are no guarantees that dating other women now, would preclude him from dating other women later, but I don’t want him to have any regrets.  I can immediately recognize this relationship as being of great value, but I probably have had more offers and temptations just because I am a woman.

 

I tried to sound like it wouldn’t bother me and assured him that I thought his dating her, and others, was the best things for us in the long run.  He said he’d call me later that night.  I tried to amuse myself so that I wouldn’t think about how their evening was progressing, but midnight came and sleep did not.  The phone didn’t ring and I knew why.

 

I've been writing my story since I was able to write, but when the media goes to share it, they only choose the parts that fit their idea of what will generate views.  If I'm going to share my story, it should be the whole story.  The titles are the dates things happened. If you have any interest in who I really am please start at the beginning of this playlist: http://savethecats.org/

 

I know there will be people who take things out of context and try to use them to validate their own misconception, but you have access to the whole story.  My hope is that others will recognize themselves in my words and have the strength to do what is right for themselves and our shared planet. 

 

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Music (if any) from Epidemic Sound (http://www.epidemicsound.com) This video is for entertainment purposes only.