In today's episode, we delve into a powerful emotion that often lurks behind our financial decisions: shame. I believe that shame is the underpinning, the very core, of the emotions we associate with our money troubles, concerns, and anxieties. As Brené Brown aptly puts it, shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.

At 35, having traversed different phases of my own money journey, I can assure you that even I grapple with shame. It emerges when I scrutinize my spending, ponder my financial future, or compare myself to others on divergent paths. That inner voice whispers, "You're falling short; you won't make it." But here's the truth: you're not doing anything wrong; your priorities simply differ.

In this episode we explore the origins of shame. Society often dictates what is deemed the "superior" way to handle money. Influencers like Dave Ramsey or the lifestyles of friends and family can become benchmarks, leading to shame if we fall short of these standards.

Consider this: shame creeps in when we attempt to fit ourselves into someone else's life framework. Trying to replicate their financial choices may not align with our true desires, causing dissatisfaction and shame. It's crucial to recognize that your path, unique to you, is not wrong; it's simply different.

I confess to feeling shame in my own financial journey. Initially fixated on societal expectations, I believed owning a house was the key to financial wisdom. However, my 2020 choice to move into an apartment sparked criticism from those advocating homeownership. Little did I know, the world would change in three months.

Had I succumbed to shame, I might have missed out on invaluable experiences. The pandemic allowed me to grow independently in my first solo living experience. Financially, I could afford an apartment in California. It granted me freedom during remote work, privacy in relationships, and ultimately led me to meet the love of my life in my apartment complex.

While some may view my years in the apartment as "throwing money away," the memories, personal growth, and relationships formed make it priceless. The key is acknowledging shame but not letting it dictate your worth or decisions. It's a tool teaching valuable lessons but should never make you feel unworthy or unlovable.

As we navigate our financial journeys, let's prioritize decisions aligned with our true selves. Pause, reflect, and ask: Does this decision feel right to me? Is it propelling me towards my desired future? If the answer is yes, let go of shame; thank it for its concern. If not, embrace the opportunity to reevaluate without succumbing to shame.

Remember, you are a beautiful soul, and your decisions impact the world uniquely. Put your money where it feels right, silencing the voice of shame.