Remember when coffee was just coffee? Now it’s a $7 identity crisis served in a mason jar by someone with a sociology degree and a neck tattoo. In this episode, Ajax takes a scalpel to the absurd ritual that coffee culture has become—from espresso flights and Chemex snobbery to the death of the sacred bottomless diner cup. This isn’t a review—it’s an autopsy.

You wanted a wake-up call? Here it is. Stay lost, stay caffeinated.