Resentment-Free Relationships

200. Repair Attempts in Conflict


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In this episode, we delve into the second step of the five-step series on resolving conflict, as taught by the Gottman Institute. The focus is on making and receiving repair attempts to manage conflicts effectively. The host, Becky, emphasizes the importance of starting conflicts softly, avoiding the 'four horsemen' that escalate fights, and adopting positive repair attempts. Techniques such as using 'I feel' statements, staying polite, and employing the Gottman repair checklist are discussed. The podcast also addresses the challenge of practicing these methods, especially for individuals prone to being people pleasers or suffering from codependency. Becky concludes with an invitation to an upcoming webinar that aims to help listeners foster healthy connections through better conflict management.


00:00 Welcome & Series Introduction

00:15 Recap: The First Step to Resolving Conflict

01:09 Deep Dive: Techniques for a Soft Startup

02:43 Understanding the Purpose of Conflict Resolution Techniques

04:27 Introducing Step Two: Making and Receiving Repair Attempts

05:47 Exploring Positive Repair Attempts

08:27 Practical Tips: Implementing Repair Attempts in Daily Life

08:53 The Importance of Practice and Persistence

09:39 Invitation to an Upcoming Webinar on Healthy Conflict

10:50 Closing Thoughts and Goodbye

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Resentment-Free RelationshipsBy Becky Smith

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