I have a third book review today. The title of the book this time is "Small Talk That Doesn't Suck" written by Patrick King. It is a guidebook designed to help people improve their conversational skills and make small talk more engaging and meaningful. The book covers topics such as starting conversations, keeping them going, and ending them smoothly. It also provides strategies for finding common ground with others, using humour effectively, and overcoming awkward situations. Overall, "Small Talk That Doesn't Suck" aims to help readers feel more confident and comfortable in social interactions. 

Let me tell you why I chose this. Recently I have been in a mood for being social. After my work gets stable to some extent as I am about to receive a work permit which the company sponsored me to stay in Canada for 2 years, I don’t have to be worried about getting laid off that much compared to the time I was in the college here. I feel like it is the time to make friends who I can trust, be compassionate, and enjoy life in Canada with. Seriously. I started using Bumble for friends which focuses on making friends among the community people belong that aiming to connect by hobbies or lifestyle and build a long-term relationship. As I talked in another episode, I am not good at being in a group of large numbers of people, I want to spend time only with people who I am interested in, and vice versa, so I decided to try this app to make friends in Canada. Although I will talk about how it goes or how I feel in another episode later, after several attempts, I still find it difficult to keep conversations going with people I only know basic information. Then I chose this book. Upon closer examination, it appeared that the book offered numerous strategies for engaging in successful small talk in English with strangers. However, upon trying to apply these strategies, I found that they did not quite align with my personal circumstances. Therefore, regrettably, this book did not meet my needs. 

It is mainly because the book mainly talked about what to be careful about in conversations, like not going too deep or showing empathy. But I was hoping for something more practical, like specific words or phrases to use in different situations. For example, ways to react when hearing a sad story or how to casually invite someone to hang out in an English-speaking country norm.

In other words, I found out that I most likely already have the basic skill to make small talk that doesn’t suck in Japanese as there were few things new to me. Still, knowing my level of communication is always beneficial.  

Anyway, there are still some good things to learn in the book. He tries to formulate many components of good conversation. This is one of these and sounds informative.

“The elements of salt, fat, acid, and heat symbolize the essential components in conversation analogous to their roles in cooking. Observe what a conversation is missing and add a little salt (humour, wit), fat (empathy, emotions), heat (passion and excitement), or acid (skepticism, curiosity) to improve it.” then he said, “Think what is missing in the conversation?”

This is good to remember, and probably some people do it unintentionally, as a natural ability. But making formulas is always a good reminder. 

The other thing, this is one of the things I wanted, it seems like “Keep your opinion hyperbolic.” is also a decent way to make our conversation comfortable even in English-speaking countries, too. To be more specific, they have examples. You are good to say “They have XX here? This place wins. This place is my new favourite diner. I want to live here forever.” or That is the worst character on TV. I think he may give me high blood pressure.” I actually have tried several times this kind of conversation but it didn’t work well. Probably I mistakenly chose the wrong topic or jokes, I don’t know but theoretically, it should work so I will try again later.