I will continue my journey as a musician. I won’t be stopped now by a depression, by another plateau. I have resisted spreading thin and shiny new ideas. What if I am here to spread out and follow the sparkle? What if I am here to evolve? What if I am allowed to be a creative wreck, all over the place, an artist bleeding out? What if I know best and better? Fail projects! Fail! Fall to the ditches along my path. I am not here to succeed. I am here to adventure. I am here to explore and taste every flavor. I will not be halted by your civilization’s tight rules, boxed minds and bumpers. Grandma, I love you and you were wrong this time for me. I will take those gutter balls. Grandma, I love you. I love you so much and I want the strike with all the risk of losing. I want the rush in my veins as my life rumbles down the lane. I’ll hold my breath and let go into the moment as she takes me.